Am I Crazy?

Lifes Falling Apart And I Can't Stop It

Connor's P.O.V.

I swear I would do anything to just see Oliver this morning. I don't know what it is about him but seeing him just seems to lift my spirit and make my day better. It made it worse that only me and Allan know where he is. It took hours for me to just stop thinking of him.

"Connor?" Allan asked.

"Yeah?" I asked still half dazed.

Nothing felt normal to me.

"Jesus christ dude you are like just not here." he said not making much sense.

"I'm just worried I'll be okay." I said leaning against the wall like I always do.

"You seem more out of it than Olly did." Allan said standing right in front of me. "You told me to call you out if I notice anything different and I am. You aren't yourself."

"I'm fine seriously Allan just a lot to think about I feel like we could have helped more than we did." I sighed everyone could hear me.

"What does he mean?" Kaleigh asked.

"Just missing Oliver." Allan answered for me.

Something everyone loved about him always there for you and when he knew you wouldn't want to talk about it he would talk for you.

"Where is he?" Kaleigh pushed.

"I-I'm not sure if he wants you guys to know." I answered this time.

"Why not?" She was kind of mad now.

"It's just rough I guess." I said looking down.

"It's ok we'll be here if you decide you want to talk about it." Jax said giving me a side hug.

I haven't even known him for that long but being away from him for just a while is making me think. What if I am in love with him. I mean he's adorable and soft but at the same time I don't think he likes me like that. He seemed so happy around Keligh but so calm around me. Like I mean little to nothing. I just felt as if he doesn't like me. So maybe he doesn't. Maybe I should just move on.

Oliver's P.O.V.

"Olly you gotta wake up bud I don't want to go to morning group alone." Anthony whined hitting me with his pillow.

"Okay okay." I said laughing "I'm up calm down please stop the assault."

"You have 5 minutes get dressed." He said laughing his ass off and throwing his pillow at me.

"Alright alright now get the hell out tiny man." I shoved him out of the room.

I felt a little better. I was still hearing things but I know it'll hopefully be better soon. I wasn't sure how well I would do in here and I regret everything. Nothing feels normal. I don't feel alive. It's only been 1 day and I already feel like I can't survive.

"Alright, Oliver let's go come on man you're taking forever!" Anthony called from the door when I had finished getting dressed.

"I'm coming calm down!" I yelled before opening the door.

"Ok now let's go." He dragged me by my hand to the activity room.

When we walked in some people had already taken a seat and started talking. It felt odd. Knowing everyone here has a secret. Something has happened. Changed. They feel sad or anxious. Sacred and lonely. It feels so much more like a dream here. You're numb to the world outside. You're not allowed to leave. Only windows. Windows 12 floors above the ground.

"Let's start you guys." Dr. Nelson said clapping. "How are you feeling today and what do you want to accomplish?"

I was to the right of him which meant I go first.