Letters From an Anonymous Reality

Letter 18

Dear Southpaw, 

I miss you. I don't think I have a right to, but I miss you. I really, really miss you. We were friends, that's it. I saw you as a mentor more than anything. You helped me, and you inspired me. You wanted me to be a better person. Why couldn't she see that? 

You left. You were taken away from me, like everyone else, like I knew you would. It hurts to know I really do seem to lose everyone, to know that this time it wasn't just paranoia, and it wasn't my fault either. It was exactly what I thought all along: fate tearing me apart. 

You told me not to be morose. It's not that easy. I'm torn apart by this monster of misery inside, and now you're gone when you were one of my main forms of defense. If I was already losing, how do you expect me to win the battles now? Maybe I can make it through the war, but these battles seem worse than the overall... "don't be morose." Well what do you expect me to be?

You said you'd be alive. I shouldn't worry because you'll be alive. Do you really think that helps? I'd rather you die and let me mourn. I could accept that you were in Heaven, waiting for me to join you someday. But you want me to know that you are out there somewhere in this miserable world, where you could be suffering? You think that will make this easier? No. Now I will forever wonder and worry about you because you are alive in a world determined to kill you. 

-A Forlorn "Sister"