CALL ME BACK? || Noah Centineo AU (3rd Book)

F O U R

Noah:

"emm... my-my name is Noah and I recently lo-lost my first child" I sturered. My eyes got a little watery but at this point I didn't cry as much as I did before. I was still very sad, but my eyes had dried out, I had no tears left to cry.

"we feel you Noah" the group said in unison. I had finally got the courage to come to therapy group. The doctor had recommended it and I thought it was necessary to move on with our lives

Sadly, Valerie was still not ready for that. She was still ignoring me at home and almost slapped me when I suggested to come to therapy group together. I was losing my mind, I didn't know how to deal with all of this. I wanted to get better, that's why I'm here, and I wanted Valerie to get better, but I couldn't drag her to the car and bring her here.

2 hours of therapy went down pretty fast. A room full of people that understood me, that had been though the same, they all lost a child, and we were all just trying to move on, that's what Stacy would've wanted, to see me and her mom happy. Not grieving in the house all day. I was doing this for her.

I checked the time, it was almost 7 pm. I was going to pick Chris at the airport. Valerie had not talked to anyone about the miscarriage, not even her parents or her sister, I was the one making all the calls, and when Chris called to check up on her and found out what was happening he decided to fly all the way here.

Valerie didn't know he was coming, and I hope she didn't get mad about it. Maybe if she didn't want to talk to me, at least she'd talk to him. That's what I was hoping for. And I didn't object when he offered to come. The drive to the airport was quite long and silent. My head was going back and forth with the only thing that's on my mind lately. Stacy's death and Valerie's depression. I can't seem to think about anything else.

I am doubtful about asking for some time off at work, maybe I can take Valerie out of that apartment and we can have some vacation to run away from this mess, to plan a vacation I'd have to actually talk to her, and that hasn't really happened in weeks.

I arrived at the airport and I parked, Chris' flight should be here anytime soon, so I just walk to the arrivals area and wait on the door where he's supposed to come from. 10 minutes later, Chris comes out of the door and engulfs me in a hug before I can even say word to him

"Noah sweetie, I'm so sorry for your loss" he squeezed me tighter. I sighed heavily and hugged back. His hug was comforting. Even if he was Valerie's best friend, he had become my friend too over the years and I needed a friend honestly.

We pulled away from the hug and Chris looked at me with a concerned look, his face full of confusion and sadness. "You do not look okay" He told me. I only shrugged, because i really didn't feel okay either. I tried to be okay, i really wanted to get better, but it wasn't easy. Chad was out of town and i haven't' seen him since we lost stacy, we talked on the phone but not much, and Valerie had been so distant that I haven't been able to talk things through with anyone, and it really sucked.

"Let's just drive back home, it's late and Valerie is alone there" I said sighing. We didn't have lots of close friends here in New York, and Valerie never wanted to leave the house, i didn't have anyone to take care of her, so I just had to leave her alone at home, now that i think about it i wasn't really a good idea, she has been so affected by the miscarriage that it worried me to no end to think what could be going inside her head.

"When we get home I'll cook my famous chicken ramen for you and V" He grinned and i chuckled "It can make anyone feel better about anything" He said hugging on the bag he was carrying on top of his legs as we were driving to the apartment.

"Good luck making Valerie eat it" I huff and sigh in exhaustion. He looks weirdly at me and I just frown trying to keep my eyes focused on the road.

"How is she really doing?" He mumbled, almost like he didn't even want to hear an answer. I bit my lip and blinked quickly trying to make my stubborn tears stop falling from my eyes.

"Not well. Not at all" It's all i manage to say, Chris sighed and patted my shoulder and i sighed running one hand across my hair. "She doesn't talk to me, she barely eats" i shook my head blinking away some tears "She never wants to leave the house and stays in stacy's room all day sitting on the floor" Chris is silent, he is only biting his lip and frowning concerned i suppose, I don't know how to handle Valerie's situation, I wish i could but i don't even know how to make her talk to me, i feel like she hates me for what happened, like she blames me for it and i am starting to believe it as well. "I can't help her... I don't know how, I'm useless, i can't help her when she needs me the most"

"Don't be so hard on yourself , Noah, You're grieving and you're trying too, it's not your fault that she's not letting you help her" I couldn't look at him for a long time because i was driving but i knew he was giving me a comforting smile. he was being so understanding and he wasn't really taking sides. There weren't sides, both Valerie and me were going through the worst part of our lives, I wish we could get through it together, but she needed to heal a little bit first for us to start moving on, I wished she would go to therapy group with me, but she wasn't open to it yet.

I only sighed and nodded at his words, i couldn't say much after that. We just silently ride into the dark night to my apartment, I wanted to say i was eager to see Valerie, I hadn't seen her since this morning, but honestly I knew how it was gonna be, and even if i missed her as hell, seeing her didn't make me miss her any less, because she was not my Valerie, and she only gave me dirty looks and eyerolls, so why would i be happy to come home every night?

I really hope Chris would talk to her and make her realize that the way she was grieving was not healthy, because whenever i tried to tell her something about it she would scream at me and then slam the door on my face.

When we arrived at my apartment, I helped chris getting his bag from the Trunk, and then we walked together to the elevator, we went to the 15th floor, where our apartment was and I opened the door slowly.

It was silent.

As always...

"Baby, I'm home" I said loud enough to make sure she heard me, there was no response, like usual. and i sighed. "Can you come to the living room? I got a surprise to you" I heard a groan come from Stacy's room, of course she was there, I sighed and heard her voice coming from that room

"Noah, don't be so fucking annoying, I'm not in the mood for any sur--" She stopped talking when she came out from the room and saw Chris. Surprise was obvious in her face, she hadn't seen him in really long, she hasn't even take his calls.

"Hey Sweetie" Chris whispered looking at her, she was standing there in sweatpants, a messy bun in her face and the deep dark circles around her tired restless eyes.

She didn't say anything before running to him and hugging him. She started crying in his chest, loudly. It hurted that she was showing her feelings to him and she never showed anything to me, but then again... i had no idea what was going through her mind.

I sighed looking at them hugging, she was crying, Chris was stroking her back and whispering things to her, I didn't want to intrude and i decided t take Chris' bags and take them to the guest room. I placed them in the floor next to the desk and sat on the bed there. I let out a groan, I should be happy , this was what i wanted all along, that she had someone to talk to. It just hurt me that it wasn't me.

I hoped talking to Chris would make her a little more open to me. 

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Sorry for taking so long to upload, what do you guys think about this story? i feel like nobody really likes it, I know its a little boring for now, but the drama is about to start.

 It hasn't been easy to write this because i'm not used to write such sad things. It's funny how my story started geting darker and sadder with every book. 

Anyways, Comment, vote and follow me if you're enjoying this <3