CALL ME BACK? || Noah Centineo AU (3rd Book)

E L E V E N

Valerie

I'm sitting in my room. The curtains are open and I'm able to see the garden outside and the other long term patients on their daily sunbath. I didn't want to go out today. My mom tries to come all day, she wants to make sure I'm with someone almost 24/7, the nurses take care of me at night.

Everyone is watching me.

I don't have the strength to rebel against them. There aren't many ways to leave this place, and they're are fewer ways to leave this life. So I'm stuck. Stuck here untill I master my lying skills. Until they trust me to not kill myself, I guess.

My door is knocked and I turn around with a frown in my face. I'm sitting down on the small wooden chair next to the window, my mom is in the couch on the other side of the room trying to make conversation.

"I'll get it" she says standing up from the couch and heading to the door. I look out still wondering if the slight warmth of this September afternoon would bring any joy to my day.

I really would love that, but I know it won't happen. I just need to get home so I can finish what I've started. I have to be on my best behavior so they let me out of here.

"I don't think she wants you here…" I hear a whisper from the door. A masculine voice follows and I think I might be hallucinating. This antidepressants must've got me high or something.

"Mrs. Hernández, I need to see her" I hear. I want to stand up and take a look but I'm afraid that my guesses are right. If he's here then he knows what I tried to do. And I didn't want him to know, he doesn't deserve to be sad because of me.

"she's already on the edge, you being here will only make things worse" My mother says. I frown. He wouldn't make things worse, they are already at their worst. Why is he here in California? I asked him not to come and find me.

I sighed. Who am I kidding I've missed him like crazy. He's the only one that's made me feel anything in this couple of weeks, just knowing he's here has quicken my heartbeat and has brought the swarm of butterflies to my stomach once again.

"Mom! Let him in" I say standing up from the chair I'm sitting and taking a deep breath before seeing him. I hear my mom scoff and then he comes into view. As handsome as ever, evident dark circles around his eyes, did I cause this to him? Why am I such a fuck up? I only bring sadness and worry to his life.

"oh my God, I'm so glad you're okay" he walks to me and engulfs me into a tight hug. My first thought is to push him away. That's all I've doing since that night at the hospital when we lost Stacy. But I don't want to do that right now. He's the only one that gets me, the only one that knows why I'm so sad about Stacy.

I decide to hug him back, As tight as I can. My head is hidden in his chest and I don't realize I'm crying and sobbing uncontrollably untill I hear his soothing words whispering to my ear that everything is gonna be fine, and I almost believe him.

"I'll go to the cafeteria… do you guys want anything?" my mom says to both Noah and me, Noah pulls away slightly to look at her and I'm still holding on to his shirt and crying my lungs out in his chest.

"we're good, thanks" he says softly. And I hear the door of the room closing. She's gone. I try to control my sobs and I look up at him, he strokes my hair softly and he looks into my eyes, his brows are furrowed together and I hate to be the one causing the worried frown in his beautiful face.

"I've missed you so much"

His frown turns into a sweet smile and only then I realize that I'm the one who said those words. Why did I say that? I did miss him, but I promised myself that I will stay away from him so he can be happy with someone else, someone that's not as fucked up as I am. Why am I saying things to bring his hopes up?