A Cross Examination of a Disgrace and Syrup with Honey

The Wonderous World of Glucose Polymers

The Phillips' kitchen smelled like homemade food and vanilla candles, but it was the scent of Derek's grease-stained coveralls that really comforted Nate today.  He had just told Derek what had happened at his father's office and the older man was pacing from the table to the counter restlessly, mumbling under his breath.  Nate was only able to catch a few words like bastard and unbelievable.

"Derek," Dana said from the stove where she was working on dinner.  "You're going to stress yourself out.  Remember your heart—"

"My heart?  I don't care about my heart!  Dana that man—" Derek turned to face her, face red with anger.  He stopped to take a deep breath when his wife looked at him with her hands on her hips and quirked an eyebrow.  "Dana, that man is unscrupulous.  He's helping out a guy who beat up someone for being gay.  The boy who was attacked could have been Garrett or Nate!"

Nate felt his stomach twisting again.

"I think Nate has had enough drama for one day and we should leave him alone," Dana answered firmly.  "We can talk about this later or tomorrow when he's a little calmer.  Not now."

With that, Dana walked to where Nate as sitting and took the empty mug still tightly trapped in Nate's grip.  He was holding onto it as if it were an anchor.

"Let me take this, dear, dinner is almost ready," she said and then brushed some of his curls away from his forehead.  Nate nodded, a tiny smile spreading on his face.

Derek sighed and came back to the table to sit in front of Nate.  "You're right, Dana.  I'm sorry, Nate."

"Don't be," Nate shook his head slowly.  "I'm pretty furious myself."

"And exhausted," Derek added, nodding towards him.  Nate had taken off his dirty jacket, but was still wearing the clothes he had worn to work, the sleeves were rolled up and his hair was a mess from all the times he had passed his fingers through it on the drive to Fort Wayne.  "Would you like to take a shower before we eat?"

"No," Nate rubbed his temples with his fingers, trying to relax.  "I'd probably fall asleep before I can even leave the bathroom."

There was a pause filled only with the sounds of Dana finishing up with the food before Derek spoke again.  "Are you planning to call Garrett and let him know you're here?"

Nate bit his lip.  "Yeah I am, but not tonight.  I'm just—I'm not ready and I really need to put my thoughts in order.  I don't want to screw things up with him even more."

"I understand," Derek said quietly.  "I'm gonna be honest with you, buddy.  I think you need Garrett right now.  Dana and I are here to help you in any way you need, but we're not Garrett and we'll never be able to make you feel better like I know Garrett can."

Nate knew they were right. He knew he would feel instantly better just by seeing Garrett, but he was still so shaken by what had just happened that day that he was afraid he would end up crying into Garrett's shirt if he saw him.  And Garrett didn't deserve that, he deserved to be asked for forgiveness in a proper way.

"I'm also against you lying to him, Nate," Derek continued.  "If he calls me and he mentions you, I can't lie to him."

"I wouldn't ask you to lie to him," Nate nodded his understanding.  "I'll talk to him.  I promise."

"Whatever is stopping you from talking to Garrett," Dana said as she put a plate of spaghetti in front of him, "don't worry about it.  He'll jump right into your arms as soon as you give him a chance.  He misses you."

Nate sighed and ran his fingers through his hair.  "God, I miss him too.  So much—" He looked up at Derek.  "I know I made a mistake, I know I hurt him, but I swear, Derek, I love him.  I want to make things right.  And I want to be with him."