Out of Desperation Came Forever After

Chapter 1

It was getting dark. I knew I should've walked faster, but I was thinking everything looked calm in the not so great section of town, so I was sure I'd be fine. I'd walked this way home from Brooke's place before. No biggie. Besides, it was a nice night. And it's always worth seeing my best friend, no matter what section of town she lives in. I walked this way because I just felt like walking. Longer than it took to get to my place. Sometimes I'd walk this way For some exercise.

Ahh Brooke. We have the bestest times. When we get together it's mostly all laughs. Laughs until our cheeks literally hurt. Tonight, we had gotten bored, and decided to "play dress up". She had gotten some new outfits, and we're the same size, so we tried them on so she could see what items matched with what. Mix and match dress up, basically. We did this whenever she went shopping. I didn't bother with it when I'd shop. I hardly shopped. I hated shopping for clothes. I wasn't fancy like her anyway. She always had nice outfits on. I was pretty much always in faded boot cut jeans, a tank top or v-neck boyfriend tee with a hoodie over top, and flip flops if it was anywhere between March and December. Tonight I couldn't find my other flip flop, so I had tossed on my sneakers instead for once. Better for walking to Brooke's house anyway. And I didn't usually do much with my hair, either. I could always be seen in a sloppy bun or claw clip, with my bangs surrounding my face. My hair was pretty long, so I didn't want to deal with it most of the time. I didn't even know why I kept it long, when all I did was keep it in a bun. I guess just in case. Just in case I'd meet the guy of my dreams....I'd have long hair to sweep him off his feet.

Hahah. I crack myself up. Sweep some guy off his feet. Yeah, right. Maybe if I was Brooke. She does it regularly. But me...I mostly just sit and watch in the background as she flirts away.

I'm either too shy, or too ugly. I don't know. I mean, I guess I'm ok...men just never really chased after me. Even when I wanted them to. I'd had plenty of crushes....but I gave up even telling Brooke about them, because nothing ever became of them. Sure, I'd had boyfriends.. One, my first love, dumped me after a year and a half, because he said I was too jealous and clingy. HE had made me that way! He was my first boyfriend! He was jealous and insecure and clingy, so I kind of "learned" from him! I hated it, though. It wasn't fun being that way, or being treated that way. When he dumped me, I thought my life would end. He was my "first", after all. I thought we'd get married someday and have kids....we talked about it, anyway. What did I know...I was 17. Luckily, I look back now and I'm glad he dumped me. We weren't a good fit to begin with. And I heard through the grapevine that he's still just as jealous in relationships. Ew.

My other boyfriend was a longer one. Almost three and a half years. I loved him though. He was so chill. I like that in a man. We'd sit for hours at night, on the hood of my car, watching the moon and stars, and asking eachother "what are you thinking?" It was perfect. I could have stayed with him forever. Everything was so simple with him. But, he dumped me in the end. For no reason other than "I was too good for him". Whatever that means. I guess because I was going to go to college soon, and he wasn't. He could barely pass high school. But I didn't care. We fit together great. That's all I cared about. All the other men in my life were quick, not worth mentioning. I'd only "been with" 3 guys yet, at age 22.

Walking on, I thought about putting my headphones on so I could listen to more of my latest music discovery, a singer named Ethan Shean, but then I decided no on the headphones, just so I could be more aware of my surroundings.

Just before I was about to pass a pretty dark alley, complete with the trash dumpsters and all, just like in the movies, I thought I heard something, followed by an "umph" sound. I paused to listen. Then I heard it again. And another "umph". Then I started hearing scuffling around, like several people's shoes on the ground. It almost sounded like they were playing basketball. Should I go past? Or not? I stood there, silent, and almost too scared to move.