Hold You Down

|XXII|

"Even in his sleep he couldn't escape."

― Madeleine Roux, Asylum

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.: M E R C E D E S :.

"August this is your last show, then you can go home and relax. Ok?" I said as I held both sides of his face, he nodded.

"Aight." He mumbled as he took the mic, heading to the stage. I sat down and finished my food that I was eating earlier.

August still has those thoughts and sometimes, I will too. I was just ready to get back home so him and I could rest because at this point , I was exhausted too, both mentally and physically.

August just been spaced out alot. I will want him to talk about it but he won't , maybe it hurts worse to talk about it. I don't know, it just bothers me to see him like that and I know inside, it's hurting him.

I finished my food and threw it away, brushing my hands off. I got bored so I started walking around the building , looking around as my phone buzzed.

From Unknown:

This love is overwhelming me. I can't take it no more

- Abel . I didn't even respond. I kept walking until I got to a room with alot of pictures of artists and signatures.

I was just looking around , admiring them when my phone buzzed again.

From Unknown:

I tried. I'm trying so hard to let you go but I can't. I never loved someone like this Mercedes

I locked my phone and kept looking around. I sighed , I was starting to miss Drew, but another text cut off my thoughts.

From Unknown:

You and your boy watch y'all back. If I can't have you , NOBODY can !

To Unknown:

Abel would you just leave me alone!!!?!?!

He didnt respond. I grunted as I ran my hand through my hair. I walked out the room, going back to the backstage and just sat on the couch Indian style. Thinking on what this nut case is capable of.

•

•

• on the road to home•

.: A U G U S T :.

"Daddy!"

"Yes Aleah?" I asked as she walked up to me. She just giggled and clapped making me smile.

I picked her up and kissed her forehead as I started rocking her.

"I love you princess."I whispered to her, she laid her head on my chest.

"I wuv you too daddy. You won't eva leave me?" She asked, I nodded.

"I'll neva leave you baybeh." I said. She sat up putting her ear against my chest.

"Daddy what's that music inside you?" She asked looking up at me.

"It's my heartbeat." I said.

"Why don't I have one?" She asked, I furrowed my eyebrows as I looked at her little chest that was bleeding.

" Aleah." I panicked, standing up with her in my arms.

"It hurt daddy." She said beginning to cry. "Daddy make it stop."

"August make it stop!!" Mercedes bleeding on the bus came to my head.

"W-wAit." I said shaking my head.

"August it hurts." Mercedes yelled holding her stomach.

"Daddy!" Aleah cried before everything started fading away but all I could see was blood everywhere.

"August!!"

"Daddy!!"

They kept piercing my ears.

"I'm sorry!!" I yelled as they kept replaying. "I can't help, I c-can't help." I said as tears started streaming and I looked at my hands, at the blood Aleah left.

"A-Aleah." I whispered.

"Fuck!" I woke up angry. These nightmares gotta stop.

"Man I'm sorry ok, I'm so fucking sorry . Please make them stop!!" I yelled as I paced around the back of the bus. I went to the bathroom and looked in the mirror as my eyes was blood shot red.

"Fuck it." I mumbled, I went to the fridge and got a big bottle of ciroc out, sitting back on the couch.

I opened, taking a big gulp as I shook my leg furiously.

I can't take this too much longer, I said in my mind. I shook my head as I took another swallow, taking it straight to the head.

"August." I looked up and saw a half sleep Mercedes.

"You ok?" She whispered. I shook my head as I looked down, taking another gulp .

"Nah I'm fantastic. What the fuck ya mean am I ok Mercedes? do I look fuckin'ok?! I just lost my fuckin' child , I'm not ok!! These damn nightmares are hauntin' the fuck outta me , I am not ok!!" I yelled , as I gulped down some more and leg shook more.

She came over to me and just hugged me. I closed my eyes as I hugged back.

"I know how you feel August." She said as she hugged me. She straddled my lap, hugging me then looked in my face.

"We gotta get through it together, ok?" She said, I nodded as i looked in her eyes.

I wanted to try to but anger still boiled in me and the liquor wasn't helping....

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