Complex desires

I still miss him

After we were told the groups we were allowed to do anything we pleased so I took out my headphones and played my music until a note passed in front of me. I didn't want to open it in fear of what it might say. Even after all these years he still writes like that... the same half scribble half cursive hand writing that only belongs to one person... Sasori.

I eventually opened the note after a lot of self convincing. 'Come to our house at 5 today to plan this project... Don't be late.'

Ok that is not so bad at least now I will have time to prepare myself before spending the evening at their house... or to convince myself to not go... which won't need any convincing at all.

I hadn't even realized that the bell had rung until I heard the students getting up to leave. Quickly getting my things together so that I didn't have to be next to him longer than necessary I ran outside avoiding all my fangirls to get home.

When I got home I went to my room and blasted my music on high so that my house vibrated and my windows rattled from the base. I danced all my feelings out until Gone came on from NSYNC when I sang my own lyrics to suit what I felt.

There's a thousand words that I could say

To make you come home, yeah

Seems so long ago you walked away

And left me alone

And I remember what you said to me

You were acting so strange

And maybe I was too blind to see

That you needed a change

Was it something I said to make you turn away

To make you walk out and leave me cold

If I could just find a way

To make it so that you were right here, right now

I've been sittin' here, can't get you off my mind

I'm tryin' my best to be a girl and be strong

I've drove myself insane wishing I could see your face

But the truth remains

You're gone, you're gone

Sasori, you're gone, boy, you're gone

Sasori you're, you're gone

Gone, gone, you're

Now I don't wanna hear excuses, Sasori

Won't change the fact that you're gone, no, no

But if there's something that I could do

Won't you please let me know

The time is passing so slowly now

Guess that's my life without you

And maybe I could change my every day, yeah

But Sasori, I don't want to

So I'll just hang around and find some things to do

To take my mind off missing you

And I know in my heart you can't say

That you don't miss me too, please say you do

Yeah

I've been sittin' here, can't get you off my mind

I'm tryin' my best to be a girl and be strong

I've drove myself insane wishing I could see your face

But the truth remains

You're gone, you're gone

You're gone, you're gone

You're gone, you're gone

What will I do if I can't be by you?

Tell me where will I turn to, Sasori, who will I be?

Now that we are apart, am I still in your heart?

Sasori, why didn't you see that I needed you here with me

Oh

I've been sittin' here, can't get you off my mind

I'm tryin' my best to be a girl and be strong

I've drove myself insane wishing I could see your face

But the truth remains

I've been sittin' here, can't get you off my mind

I'm tryin' my best to be a girl and be strong

I've drove myself insane wishing I could see your face

But the truth remains

You're gone, you're gone

You're gone, you're gone

Sasori you're, you're gone, you're gone

But the truth remains you're

 "Gone..." I spoke the last word into the silent house as the CD stopped working as I sighed and looked to see the time. 4:30 pm. I should leave now as I know that he doesn't like to be kept waiting.