Complex desires

Confusion

I had to leave. My body just froze when I saw him look at me with such sadness and regret. When he started to walk towards me I had to get out of there so I ran.

I don't know how I will face him at school nor did I want to but I need to go at least on Friday for the competition then I can drop out. It wasn't like I didn't finish school yet. Hell I already have a degree but can't use it because of my age not that I will ever get the chance to in the first place... after all I am dying.

I just sighed at my last thought before staring up at my ceiling contemplating my options before falling asleep.

I awoke the next morning refreshed the incident long forgotten as I dressed for school. When I arrived I was the new hot topic of gossip but I ignored everything and everyone around me as I searched for Kira and Hotoru.

"Sakaru-san!" At the sound of someone calling my name I turned to see Pein headed my way. When he reached me he stood there awkwardly of a few moments before looking around us to see if anyone was listening in once satisfied he turned to me.

PeinPOV

After I made sure no one was paying attention I turned to look at Sakaru who was just staring at me blankly. I gulped before deciding to speak less I lose my nerve.

"Are you really dating Kira?" Silence greeted me as Sakaru just looked at me with an unreadable expression on his face.

"Why?" The way his voice was void of no emotion freaked me out but I didn't show it as I looked directly into his eyes.

"I want to ask her out on a date but if she is dating you I will back off." I secretly hoped that he will say that they were not dating but I didn't want to get my hopes up only to have it crash.

"How long have you liked her?" I thought back to when I first felt these feelings.

"About 4 months? When I first saw her at the mansion after the concert..." He had an intense look as if trying to concentrate on something while I stood there watching him.

"Why haven't you done anything before?" That one was easy.

"I didn't do anything because I heard she was going out with you and I didn't want to ruin her relationship with you, if she liked you, that is." I can't believe I am talking this much and to the girls boyfriend no less!

"Are you willing to give up your chance of happiness for her if only to see her smile?" His face was completely serious as he spoke those words. I didn't need to even think twice before answering.

" Yes I would. She means more to me than anyone else and I don't want to see her upset that is why I came to you first." I watched anxiously as he thought over my words. Just as I was about to lose my cool he smiled. I was stunned as I gazed at him... he looked so much like a girl... but I just shook that thought off. There was no way that Sakaru was a girl... right?

"Ask her to go out with you. I am sure she will say yes." Those words were like music to my ears until I actually registered what was said.

"But aren't you going out with her?" I will not have her choose between us.

"No that was just a cover up for fan girls!" He shouted over his shoulder and I could see the smirk on his face as he walked away making girls swoon after him.

Sakaru POV

I was happy the entire day. I had this constant smile on my face and I kept daydreaming about Kira and Pein together which just improved my mood.

During lunch I just walked around but as I turned to walk down one of the corridors someone pinned me to the wall. I looked up to see Itachi but his head was bowed so I couldn't see his face.

"Um Itachi?" My voice rang out in the empty corridor but still he didn't look at me.

"What did you and Pein talk about?" His voice was soft I had to strain my ears to hear him speak.

"What?" Why would he ask that?

"Answer me!" He punched the wall beside my head making me jump at the sound of his voice raised and the impact of his fist.

"Why do you care?" My voice back to monotone.

" I saw you with him... the smile on your face as you walked away from him and how he has been happy all day... just like you..." What is his problem... why would that concern him of all people?

"Are you stalking me now?" How else would he have known?

"Just answer me!" He shouted as his head snapped up to look at me. His eyes held so much emotion that I just couldn't figure out which was more dominate feeling at the time.

"It has nothing to do with you so I don't have to answer you!" He was acting strange... was he sick?

He looked hesitant but as I tried to leave I felt something warm pressed to my lips. My eyes widened in shock as I saw Itachi with his eyes closed in front of me. I felt it move against my lips but I was frozen in shock. My mind wouldn't react and neither would my body as I just stood there.

When he pulled back he looked at me with shocked eyes. My body decided that it was time to work as I turned and ran down the corridor. One thought on my mind.

That was my first kiss...