My Heart's Blabbers

A Typical Hoarder...

Disclaimer: This chapter absolutely isn't intended to offend anyone, because I'm just conveying what I currently feel, or discover about myself. I truly apologise if this update struck somebody deep in their soul & bringing up something unpleasant up to the surface. But it is what it is, & it is in us, if not all. Some of us. Acknowledge, & advance forward.

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Dang...

Now that I'm a little free over the weekend, I can see that I'm hoarding virtual books for myself. Over the years, I keep following other people, trying to put books I find on Wattpad in my Lists, then thinking of reading them whenever I'm free.

The thing is, I simply don't have that leisure on my disposal anymore. More writers write more books every single day, & I can only chase after so much titles. So I'm pretty much already defeated. In a way. Haha.

When I was a bit younger, since I've learned to spend my pocket money etc, I've been buying novels, collecting comic magazines & mangas, & collecting garage sale cool anime OVAs & things along those lines. But I'm not into action figures or movie posters or music CDs. I was a kind of a '90s small time written fiction & mangas enthusiast.

As of currently, when my family does this & that over these past few days around the house, I've found a bit of my scattered collection of those printed papers. I want to at least skim through them in hopes of making use of them in the near future, if I don't sell them as second-hands. You know, for reference or something. I'm going to take an animation course later in this year, so I hope the books can at least help in a way. That is, if I'm accepted by the university.

& this stubborn thing in me is still telling me to hold on to them instead of selling them off just to make space in the now cramped & unpleasant looking house.

We do need to implement the KonMari method as a family unit who hoard supposedly nostalgic items.

That's how hoarders think in general too, I guess.

"This thing is useful, & is still in good condition. It definitely has value. But I don't want it damaged or misused for now. I can use it later, so I need to store it safely in my house."

"I love what I love, so I'm going to keep them all with me, no matter what. They are my source of childhood memories, my keepsakes. & if I move anywhere, they're coming with me."

That piles up quickly over a span of time, making 'this thing' multiply into 'these things' in no time at all. Doesn't matter if it takes a short few days or a long time over the years, but things pile up, & there's simply no more space left for you to put them all around yourself.

Not all of my family members do this, but hell, the ones who do, they collect & leave it in the house for.. keepsake, I think. Safekeeping.

Mirror, please. Ouch.

Anyway, one thing I'm certain about is that, doesn't matter how much you want to save & keep everything for the sake of nostalgia or memories... none of them you can bring into your own grave. You can't bring them into the afterlife with you. Those objects can't help you pass through.

That includes money or inheritance as well, if you count money as the one thing that you collect or hoard all throughout your life. Wealth, I mean.

You can never bring them with you, when you die.

So, don't get too attached to these things. They can't help you, or your hoarding habits.

I think I'm being cruel & morbid here... I better stop.

& I need to clean up my room & help to refurbish the whole house as well. Keep the most important family stuff, but throw away the junks & sell unused stuff as second-hands.

It's not hard. It's just the procrastinating hoarder in you chaining you down & taking you hostage, which should easily be dismissed by saying,

Yes, let's clean up.