Broken Inside

41. I failed as a son

S W A R A

A week before I got to know everything... which I didn't know and I actually blamed for all the activities which was not done by him. I still do feel really guilty for my actions before yet he asked me never to do so. He was the same all the time it was just me, only me who pushed him away and maybe that's why he was behaving that way in Paris.

I was eating my breakfast alone and he didn't join me. Infact he has still in his room and has not come out from his room. Is he sleeping? Might be, we came home nearly at 1:00 a.m but he still gets up. Is there something wrong?

Having my breakfast I knocked his room door.

"Sanskaar" I called him for thrice.

"Swara you go to office I'm not feeling well today." I heard his voice.

Not well? Is he having fever or something? Oh god!

"You aren't well? Open the door let me just check it up what's wrong?" I tried to open the door but it was locked from inside.

"You leave to office, I'll be fine." I heard him say again.

Before I would protest my mobile displayed a message notification from our p.a saying to come fast.

"Swara leave I'll be okay."

I'm really not convinced with this. I didn't want to go leaving him behind but today's meeting is important as well. I'm greatly stuck in a tight spot uff...

"You'll be fine right?"

"Yeah I'll be."

"Fine take care and eat your breakfast." I said and left to the office.

__________________

Gosh! I thought I would be there before 6:00 at home. I don't know whether he had has lunch. I did call him but he didn't pick it up. Today was an hectic day with lots of meetings and paper works to be done. I had finish them so very quickly yet I didn't manage to go home for lunch in fact I skipped my lunch this time.

Red signal! Damn I'm already rushing home and this traffic... Urghh! I don't know why but I feel something.. something as if he wasn't well not physically but mentally because morning when he answered me his voice was cracky as if he was trying hard to speak.

Green signal! Uff finally.. I started driving back home and reached. I came inside and dropped my bag and blazzer on the couch. Before I would get into his room I saw the breakfast I prepared for him still untouched. Everything was the same except I found a water bottle on the table that's all. Something is really bad then!

I placed my hand on the knob of the door and pressed it down to open and it opened. The room was filled with darkness, the windows were closed and curtains were still not removed. It was too much suffocating as not even the fan was switched on. That is when I saw a figure sitting at one corner with head hidden between his knees and hands hugging his legs.

The room was deadly silent and my heart started thumping in fear.... Sanskaar.. he can never be like. I've never seen him this way. I immediately rushed and opened the curtains and windows to let some breeze in and I sat beside him and placed my hands on his head softly.

He slowly looked up making me hell shocked and worried.

He.. he was crying! His face and red was completely red and his face was drenched with tears. He blinked while tears flowing down from his bloodshot eyes, his thick lashes stuck together in clumps as if he'd been swimming. The tears made wet tracks down his face and dripped from his stubbled, wobbling chin.