z.b (imagines) [💭]

midnight

     I turn over with a huff, the duvet slightly slipping off my body from Zak hogging it all. Sighing, I grab my phone, flinching at the bright light as I check the time. 12:03am. It's a bit early, especially for Zak, but he works all the time anyway, so I don't blame him. I finally put my phone down, shutting my eyes tight to relax them from the sudden intense light. I sigh again, letting my arms fall down to my sides as I turn my head looking at him. 

     I can't lie, Zak looked cute as shit while sleeping. I smile to myself as I stare at him. Unsettling I know, but can you blame me? I find myself running a hand across his face, pulling strands away from his eyes. He stirs under my touch, groaning in his sleep before relaxing again. I laugh silently as I do it again, this time causing him to complain. 

     "y/n...stop, I'm trying to sleep..." he grabs my wrist softly and pushes it away, causing me to laugh more audibly.  He settles back down and falls asleep again and this time around I let him. It's not everyday he gets a full nights rest, he is an investigator after all.

     You roll over again, now on your back staring up at the white ceiling that lights up every now and again from the passing cars, creating dark shadows that slid from one end of the room to the other. You sigh, leaning your head towards Zak again, his sleeping face looking towards you. You smile at yourself, thinking about how much you love him.

     That thought alone makes your skin crawl. You had only been dating Zak for 4 months now and it didn't feel right to confess your complete love for him already. You look at his sleeping face again, being brought to tears at the thought of him being not returning your feelings with an 'i love you too.'

     You cover your eyes with your palms, feeling like a whole dumbass for crying over something like this. If Zak didn't love you, why would he voluntarily put up with you for 4 straight months?! You try to think optimistic, sniffing your way there and disturbing a sleeping Zak in the process.

     "Okay how's about you..go blow your nose or something cause these allergies-" Zak sits up slowly, taking notice that your eyes are covered and your chest is heaving up and down rather quickly. "whoa hey, y/n are you alright?.." You mentally facepalm for waking him up. You only nod, afraid your voice would crack and reveal that you're actually the polar opposite of alright. This time, he nods. "no. no you're not, tell me what's wrong babygirl.."

     You sigh, now feeling drained and extremely tired. how come i wasn't tired like, 20 minutes ago?! Removing your hands from your eyes, you allow Zak to see your dimly lit face in the moonlight. He admires the wetness of your cheeks and how puffy your eyes looked, it broke his heart. You shrug, finally gaining the courage to actually say something rather than just lay there having Zak stare at you.

     "It's just that, I don't know...I keep thinking.." Zak frowns, "about what?.." you shut your eyes tight, this is it, this is your time to fuck this up with your emotions. "Thinking about how much I love you and how our feelings may not be mutual and that if I said I loved you, you'd turn away from me or something.."

     You run your words out verbatim to what you were thinking about just moments prior to this heart wrenching situation. You can't even look Zak in the eyes as you poured your heart out, you couldn't bare to see his reaction yet. Silence consumes the room and the atmosphere becomes thick, so thick that you can barely breath anymore.

     You quickly get up and run downstairs, Zak's lack of reaction only leading you to believe your pessimistic side was all but false. You can't even bother to turn on any lights in the living room, you just sit in the dark alone, curling up into a ball and crying, crying because you pushed too far in a still-brand-new relationship and possibly fucked it up.

     After a few minutes of just sitting there, you feel a presence enter the living room and a dip in the couch cushion. You don't dare look up, too ashamed in yourself to even attempt to. "y/n..y/n..look at me.." he mumbles softly, a soft hand rubbing your arm. You hesitantly look up at him, tears clouding your vision so you can only make out the outline of him, but you see him nonetheless.

     "im so sorry i didn't say anything, truly i am...i guess i was just in shock that you beat me to it.." he chuckles lightly, bringing a smile to your face. "if i'm being honest here.." he continues, scooting closer towards you. "i feel the same way baby, i just haven't reached the point where i have the courage to say it yet i guess..."

     He smirks at himself, "basically what im trying to say here is that..i love you too." you immediately perk up, legs dropping back down to the floor and hands pushing on the couch. "really?!" he smiles wide at you, "hell yeah." You laugh happily as you jump towards him, wrapping your arms around his neck and kissing him all over.

     He laughs too, hands gripping your hips as you straddle him, hands exploring his hair. "So, can we go back to bed now? I'm hella tired." you only chuckle at him.

nearly 1k words!!
i haven't written 1k in so fucking long dude