His Death Awakened Me (BoyxBoy)

Chapter 21: Three Months Later

I felt the cool air on my face as I sat out on the back deck, listening to the sounds around me. Fall was my favorite season. I loved seeing all the different colors of the trees as the leaves began to change color. I brought my mug of hot chocolate up to my lips and sipped on it little by little, not wanting to burn my tongue. Suddenly arms were wrapping around me as I sat in the chair, and I tilted my head up to look at Sean.

"You're home early," I said. He brushed his lips against mine and kissed me gently.

"Yeah they let us go early," he replied.

"How was your day?" I asked.

"It was good, just the usual. How about you?"

"It was alright, kinda boring," I shrugged. "I'm so glad it's the weekend. I always look forward to the weekends." Sean smiled and came around the chair. He sat down in the one next to mine, taking my hand in his as we looked back out at the scenery. Our apartment had it's own little deck off the back and there was grass and trees out back, giving us the perfect view of the colors of fall. Sean and I had settled into our new place together about a month ago. Sean looked at places just like he said, but he made sure I really liked it before he picked this one. He was so sweet. So far, it's been absolutely amazing living on our own together. I couldn't be more thrilled with how things have turned out as far as our relationship goes.

"Have you heard from your dad at all?" Sean asked. I could tell he was genuinely curious. However, he regarded me carefully, searching my face for the emotions he knew I was attempting to hide. I drew in a big breath and exhaled slowly.

"Yeah..I..uh, talked to him a little bit ago. He says things are alright, but I can't help but feel bad," I replied slowly, licking my lips as I took another sip of hot chocolate. Sean reached over and rubbed my back.

"Hey," he said, pulling me out of my thoughts that I didn't know I was getting lost in. My parents were now separated. I haven't spoken to my mom since everything happened. Dad told me things weren't looking good. They just had so many differences. Even though he didn't say it, I knew it was because of me. My mom just couldn't accept that she had a gay son. As far as she was concerned, Collin and I had both died in that car accident. I suddenly felt a sharp pang of sadness twisting its way around in my chest. I placed my hand over my heart, clutching my chest without thinking.

Sean stood up from his chair and knelt down in front of me, positioning himself between my legs. He grasped my hand away from my chest and held it with both of his hands. His touch was gentle and soothing. I felt warmth washing over me. Our eyes met.

"Jake. This is not your fault," he stated, his gaze piercing mine with such intensity. I realized in that moment that he was right. He was usually right about things like this. I didn't change, I was still the same person she gave birth to. I had just been enlightened. I discovered who I was and what I wanted in life. The man sitting in front of me, was my everything. He gave me all the love and then some that I had missed since losing Collin and my mother. He was there for me in the good times and the bad. I was so grateful for him and incredibily in love with him.

"I know it isn't," I smiled. He gently stroked my cheek with his fingers, brushing them over my cool skin. The warmth and intensity he transferred to me was amazing. I felt like I was enveloped with electricity; a spark that would never flicker out. I brought my face slowly closer to his, before reaching his lips and kissing him fiercely. I felt Sean relax into the kiss, as if I convinced him with my actions that I truly was okay. His hand moved behind my head and pushed me into him.

"I love you," he murmured against my lips, I smiled against his.

"Love you," I whispered huskily, desperately wanting more of his lips. I loved the feel of him touching me. He pulled back when his phone vibrated. He reached into his pocket for his phone and I grumbled under my breath, slightly annoyed at the interruption. Then I remembered we were outside on the deck and my cheeks heated up. Sean answered the call and flicked my nose. I scrunched my face at him playfully. He chuckled.