Madferit

Will You Be by My Side?

My parents and sister were gone leaving me all alone in the house. I didn't mind it though. I liked being by myself...for the most part anyway.

Even when I was around other people I was too damn shy to speak up so I'd disappear into my own mind playing make believe and daydreaming about whatever popped into my head.

That would always get on my dad's tits. We'd be driving or something and he'd want someone to talk to but I made a piss poor conversation partner. It wasn't that I didn't have anything to say. I was just too damn shy to say it.

But that was going to change in a year. In one year's time I'd be off somewhere new. Not somewhere too far from home but far enough to start over. To reinvent myself and become the social butterfly I always dreamed of being.

The girl who got dates without trying. The girl who had loads of friends and got invited to loads of parties. Frat parties.

'Hang on!' I stopped myself. 'They ain't even got frats where you're goin'!'

True. They opted out while most other places didn't. But I knew they still had parties because I went to one when I visited. My first ever time playing beer pong.

But that was only one night and I was back to my current state. My current life that everyone said would be over before I knew it. And then a new chapter would begin.

I'd written myself letters – declarations of how I was and wasn't going to be the following fall. I'd put myself out there. I'd do everything I said I would do. I'd make memories to last a lifetime.

But for now I'd just watch TV.

Another dream of a far away place. A place I'd wanted to go since I was in elementary school. A culture I'd become obsessed with since I first heard one region's particular accent.

And now I was fascinated by another one's.

"Hear tracks from Oasis' newest album, Dig Out Your Soul."

My birthday was on the horizon. In only a couple weeks' time I'd be an adult. Missing being allowed to vote in the Presidential election by a few days but still old enough for other stuff.

I could buy cigarettes.

'But you don't even smoke!'

I could sign off on my own animals' medication papers.

'Yeah, you could do that.'

I could buy that CD.

'Um, you don't have to be eighteen for that...and honestly, don't you think you might get it for your birthday anyway?'

True. I already asked for a pair of knee high boots like the ones I seen Kate Moss wearing in some tabloid. Plus a blanket to commemorate the college I'd be attending.

'There you go. Sorted!'

I smiled to myself as I thought about it then turned back to the TV.

I was surprised MTV would even broadcast it. But it was a whole special with the whole band discussing their favorite songs by other bands.

I took it for all it was worth. It was probably going to be one of the only times I'd ever see Kasabian or Razorlight on TV at home so I couldn't fucking miss it.

"I like the paints and colors..."

"Me too, Darlin'." I replied staring at him on the screen. "Me too."