Ishihara // ATEEZ ✔

42 |1| Regrets

The royal servant announces their arrival to the queen from behind the door and when she receives the permission to let them enter, she opens the door for them while keeping her head low. Yunho lets Akira enter first, and he follows from behind. The queen is already waiting for them sitting at the round table, two empty chairs prepared for them. Three steaming cups of tea are already served on the table, and the queen puts out a hand when she sees them standing motionless near the door.

"Come and join me, won't you?" she says, her sharp voice long gone, replaced with a softer one. She doesn't sound demanding, but she sounds genuinely inviting. As they hear this, they move slowly and plop on the velvet chairs. The three of them eye the tea, but none reach for it. "Isn't it nice for us to gather like this, like old times? It reminds me of how we used to go around the palace, the three of us being the best of friends and making everyone in the palace tired of our antics. Ah," she chortles. "I really miss those times."

"Then why... did you change?" Akira questions. "If you really wanted to preserve what we had, you could've done so. You were the turning point in our friendship, Emira." She drops the honorifics, knowing that at this time, it doesn't matter anymore. "Our friendship broke up because of you."

"Did you," she tenses, "-really think that I'm the reason for our broken friendship?"

"Taking on the throne at such a young age... we understand how you could change because of that," Yunho interjects. "But the years of friendship couldn't be gone just because you became queen. You never cared for the colours, you never-"

"You're right, I never did!" she shouts, her eyes wide as she slaps her palm on the table. "Have you ever thought that you-" she points across the table to Akira, "-are the reason I changed? The reason that our friendship suddenly broke up?" When the two soldiers only look at her with resentment in their eyes, she starts hitting her chest with her fist before exclaiming, "Did both of you forget what day today is? Did you even care to remember?"

They always remember before, but today they don't. The anniversary of Emira's parents' deaths. The past king and queen, who died during a bloodbath for revenge.

"As I held both of my parents in my arms on that day, I couldn't stop crying and I kept on shouting their names. But did you know whose name my father called out? It wasn't mine. It was yours," she spits, looking at Akira full of disgust. "At that moment he told me everything and I finally understood why you suddenly came into the palace, why you are allowed to live even if you have black blood, especially why you seem to be in my father's favour. Have you... ever wondered who your parents are? Where they are now?"

The general doesn't answer. She wants to hear everything that comes out of the queen's mouth without being disturbed.

"Both of your parents died. You want to know who they are?" the queen's eyes glaze over but she drops no tears. "Your mother was a commoner from Nyla and your father..." she trails off. She pronounces the next sentence painfully, evident in her eyes, "...was the king. My father."

Yunho's jaw drops as he hears this, while Akira's shoulders slump, not believing every single thing that comes out of Emira's mouth. Both of them are rendered speechless, and this spurs Emira to continue.

"The king went for a visit to that damn kingdom, Nyla," she enunciates the kingdom's name with so much hate, "-and he happened to fall in love with a commoner- your mother. I know my father got married to my mother because he was forced to, they were never in love. And I was born. I barely got any love from him because I'm not the child he wanted. He wants to have a child with a woman that he actually loves. So he fell in love with your mother, and she ended up getting pregnant with you. But my father - he's the king, he can't go around marrying a lowly commoner. You were born and your mother came to the palace, begging him to take both of you in. My mother was furious and she ordered the soldiers to kill your mother in front of everyone at the palace. But she spared you, because they won't kill a baby. You were taken in, but you were given to the servants to be taken care of. You grew up not knowing where you came from, and as you cannot see colours, the king swore everyone to keep a secret about your blood colour. We grew up together because I was too young to understand the disgrace behind your birth and I never cared about your blood. I never did," her tone is weak.