My Dilemma ~ Mark Lee FF ✔

Mark

The whole rest of the weekend was a blur. I lost what little appetite I had left. My eyes were drier than the desert over the tears I shed. Luckily, Johnny would ever so often check on me or at times bring me food, but it didnt help much like it normally did. Everything made me depressed and confused. I felt myself slipping away.

On Sunday night I decided to tell Johnny the truth. I started to speak when he came in to check on me that morning. Maybe he will finally open up and listen for once maybe not.
"How are you doing?" He stared at me hoping to get answer. Throughout the whole weekend I didnt once speak, yet he still tried to poke an answer out from me.
"The best that I can.. I guess."
"Thats good. Are you up to talk about it?"
"Yeah.." I sit up out of my bed and face him.
"Before you do, just know that Im not going to get mad at you. Just tell me as it is."
"John, It wasnt Mark. Felix-"
"Wait wait, It wasnt Mark? Are you serious? Y/n, this not a time to play jokes on me."
"Im serious. It wasnt his fault! I swear, here me out."
"Your really defending him!? Wow. You listen to me y/n. What Mark did was wrong. Felix has already told me what he did to you. He tried to hurt you. I knew he'd try something. If only I could have protected you more.. im sorry." He embraces me.
"What did Felix tell you?.."
"Felix told me that Mark tried making a move on you and that you were so uncomfortable that you were crying. Apparently when Lix saw that, he pulled him off you. With that he pushed him into the nearest guest room to protect you because Mark at that point tried to get violent with him."
"What-"
"Hes bad okay understand that y/n, dont be stupid. I know you still have a crush on Mark, but when someone makes you so uncomfortable that you cry like that, its not a good thing." My brother tightens the hug.
Johnny my only good thing in my life didnt listen to my pleading. Instead, he ignored it. He was oblivious to Felix's lies and didnt consider the possibilities. Alike me he was too focused on Mark's image.
Now more than ever I wanted my brother to leave. I only needed to talk to one person and that was myself. It was the first time in my life my brothers embrace felt cold and empty.
"Please leave.. you dont understand you didnt even stop to listen to me. Please leave." I whisper.
"What, your being ridiculous. "
"Leave. Come back when you haven't picked your friends over your sister." I begin to sob agian. Johnny looks at me confused and disappointed. He walks out my room shutting the door behind him.
Personally I needed space from him, and thought hes only doing what he thinks is best, it just makes it harder on me. Grabbing my phone, I finally look into my conversations.
And wouldn't you know 3 people tried to converse with me that night.

*Chenle: Have a good night! Johnny told me you weren't feeling well, I hope you get better!"

*Felix: I hope your feeling better. If you need anything you have me! Im just a call or text away! :)

I shake my head and click on the last conversation. Mark's conversation.

*Mark: If you need to talk, I'm here. Im sorry you had to here that. If only Johnny wasn't there to step in and get it twisted, I could of beat Felix's ass for disrespecting you like that.

I click off my phone and look up at my wall. How crazy it is to think im actually considering this friendship. Ill never know if I dont try. Id rather hang around Mark than Lisa and Felix anymore anyway.. Just one thing that bothers me no one realizes that Lix and Lisa are not all good. Not even poor Chenle. Im done caring at least I knew I can kinda rely on Mark. At that moment staring at my white blank wall, I made up my mind. Even If rumors come spreading down on me, I dont care. At this point, I dont even care if Mark is another mistake waiting to happen. My life is a mess anyway, Im willing to throw it all way even if he plays me in the end too. I have nothing to lose anymore.

MONDAY MORNING

My brother woke me up early today. When I mean early, I mean that it was still dark and cold outside. Though this time, he woke me up casually instead of freaking me out with the whole time thing. He decided yet agian that having breakfast at Jae's would help to ease my mind and get me out of my depression.