Ding

.04

It was the day of the Asian Artist Awards, I was both excited and dreading this moment. Excited because even if I can't admit it to anyone else and can only admit to myself, I was excited to see him again, i've been looking at his pictures and watching a lot of his fancams these days. So I was definitely excited to see him but I was also dreading the fact that his ex was going to be here and I was afraid to see if he still has feelings for her but it wasn't just his ex that was going to be here but his celebrity crush as well.

IU sunbaenim was going to be here. I still remember when she was at last year's award shows. He kept staring at her and admiring her as if I wasn't there. I mean technically we weren't anything last year. I knew he liked me and I knew he was going to confess which is why I started paying attention to him but when I saw him staring at his crush, it didn't sit well with me. I don't blame him though. I mean IU sunbaenim is gorgeous. She's so beautiful. She has such a beautiful voice. She writes and composes her own song. Any guy will chose her over me, even I would chose her over myself but seeing the guy that likes you, show interest in someone else really sucks.

So as much as I'm excited to see him, I'm worried at the same time that I will see and learn things that I do not want to see or learn. Also I really don't like these award shows where actors are at because some of them are a little too forward despite the age differences. I really don't like getting hit on by someone that is older than my oppa or same age as my appa.

As we entered the venue, we were escorted to our seats. I was surrounded by past and current idols as well as actors and actresses. I couldn't help but look around to see if I can see where they would be seating but I didn't see any empty seats that catered to 7 people. As I took my seat and turned to face the front, i realized that there was another section on the opposite side of us. We were split and I can see that he would be sitting across from me. I was actually happy with this sitting arrangement because now I can look at him directly across from me with it out being suspicious.

"Your boo thang is sitting across from us" Chae whispered to me as she leaned over towards my seat. "Yeah, so is yours" Chae was currently talking to Vernon of Seventeen. They met through Somi our ex-JYP family member and whom could've been the maknae of TWICE when we were all on SIXTEEN our survival program. Chaeyoung and Somi are very close to each other and Somi is part of a group chat for mixed idols whom Vernon is part of as well. Vernon mentioned that Chaeyoung was his bias in TWICE and next thing you knew, they started talking.

I have a similar group chat but mines is with Chinese female idols. Fei and Jia meimei started it when they were active and they brought me in when I debuted. The original Chinese kpop idol was part of the group chat as well and she provided so much information. She helped a lot of us be able to become successful or whom to avoid.

Speaking of who to avoid, here comes Zico sunbaenim. He has tried multiple times to court me but I told him each time I was not interested. It didn't bother him one bit that I have a very respectful relationship with his ex which was even more of a turn off from me. One thing I don't do is get involved with my friends exes. That's just messy and not classy. He eventually gave up and moved on to someone else.

I was also advised to avoid older men in the industry in general especially the ones with the "respectful" image because 90% of the time, they are not respectful at all. I found that out the hard way when an actor I respected approached me for my number because he wanted to be friends turned out that was not what he wanted and it ruined his image for him. It's an experience that I will always remember which is one of the main reasons I hate attending award shows or events that have actors at because I do not want to run into him.

As we settled in, I turned to face the front and there he was with his members. I took this opportunity to just stare at him from afar. Admiring how he looked becoming mesmerized by his beauty. "If you keep staring, people are going to notice" Jihyo unnie said as she leaned into me. I smiled at her turned my attention back to the show.