That Stupid Little L-Word:

Chapter Thirty Four:

Blue-Eyes is still a little butt-hurt and frosty when I climb into the passenger seat of his ink-colored mustang the next morning, though I have to admit, the injury is very well hidden. He greets me with his usual, "Good morning, babe. You look stunning today," and he even flashes me a crooked smile as I buckle my seat belt. 

But I can still see the annoyance that clouds his vivid baby blues, and tugs at the corners of his lips. 

That and the tense, metaphorical elephant that sits between us kind of takes up most of the car space.

The ride to school is remotely quiet, and when we pull into the usual parking spot, he is quick to wrench the key from its slot and climb out of the car. I linger, thumb pressing into the little red button that releases my seat belt, and try not to be as obvious as I watch him round the front of the car.  He holds his hand out for my backpack as I open the door and start to climb out. I pass it to him as I pull myself free of the car, and then frown as he starts to shoulder it. 

"I can hold my backpack now," I remark as I slam the car door shut. The hollow memory of metal against the insides of my arms haunts me; I feel so bare without my crutches. 

He wordlessly holds out the backpack and I worm my arms through the straps. 

His hand slips into mine and we walk toward our first period class. My stomach churns nervously as we approach the doors to the building; we are a good five minutes early, which gives us plenty of time to make out in our usual spot. But as we near the door, and the silence between us becomes oppressing, a small shard of worry prickles my gut. I have a feeling that Blue-Eyes doesn’t really feel like a passionate make out session this morning.

His hand grasps the door handle, and he holds the door open for me. I step inside, and then pause a few steps in for my boyfriend. I shiver at the sudden onslaught of cold air, and my gaze flickers around the hallway. It lands on our usual spot; the small alcove between two sets of lockers. Blue-Eyes squeezes my hand and we start walking again.

My suspicions are confirmed when we stroll right past the usual make-out spot and continue on toward the classroom. I press my lips into a firm line. He holds the door open for me once again, and the troll sitting behind his desk actually has the audacity to feign a surprised expression. 

"Well," our teacher lets out a throaty gasp, complete with a palm pressed to his chest for dramatic flair, "Look who actually showed up on time!" 

I ignore the old fart and slink toward my seat, as graceful as the giant boot I’m forced to wear will allow. I slide into it and slip my backpack from my shoulders. Blue-Eyes snatches the seat in front of me, and almost immediately whirls around to look at my face. He shoots me a cheeky grin and I arch an eyebrow. 

"What?" his tone is coated with innocence. 

"Nothing," I shrug slightly. 

The rest of the morning passes in a fuzzy, disappointing blur, as Blue-Eyes continues to keep a good two foot space between our bodies at all times, like a nun at a formal dance. He walks me to every single class, and his fingers are always intertwined with mine, and, like normal, I find myself loathing the idea of parting with him –even though he refuses to kiss me anywhere else other than my cheek. 

And after each parting, I find myself doodling in my notebook while my teachers prattle on about unimportant topics, trying to ignore my gut’s desperate scream for attention. Something is very wrong, and a tiny voice in the back of my head is convinced that it’s because of last night. Now that I think about it, I was so stupid last night. He is probably going to break up with me soon, and the distance is just something to make it easier for him.