Confederate & Feelings

Particularly Begining

~~~

"I didn't think it was even possible,
For me to stop resisting myself from you but...
I guess, it was."

~~~

XANDER stood in front of me, smiling and reassuring that everything will turn out just fine. While Alex was moping and glaring at me while fixing his drummer setting.

Rahman was happy, his face told everything. Like he was eager to hear me sing more than anyone.

And Quintin, he just stood there. Waiting for me to start, watching.

I inhaled, gave them the music sheet so they could express the rhythm and I exhaled, gave myself an amount of time to sing my first song for the first time.

"All right Leilani, we're ready when you are." Quintin said, taking just one minute to look at the music sheet.

Other guys nodded and I couldn't help but to surround my eyes towards Xander. Who was already smiling at me, mouthing 'good luck' because I sure needed it.

It was like his words are supposed to calm me down.

And it did.

I took out my mic which was gifted by mum at my 16th birthday. She once told me when I had the courage to share my voice to people, the mic would be there for you no matter what. It's me and my voice.

Singing, shining.

I wished she was here. I wished both my parents were here. Lying to them is probably the greatest mistake I have ever done.

But now?

I took another look at Xan and turn myself into rhythm.

"Everyday comes to this,
Shining when you're there with me,
Everyday comes to end,
Hurting when it's all people,
Writing songs,
At my notebook,
Some day, maybe tomorrow,
I would take a chance to show..."

I wasn't in shock. I already knew Lei would totally kill it but I was more worried if she didn't know that she had the power to kill it. Lei had a voice, a voice that'll make you get up and just listen. The more you hear her, the more you wanna just...listen.

Her eyes were only fixated on me. And mine was in hers. Each rhythm created a graceful melody. Each words planted a beautiful lyric. And each pieces showed every kinds of Leilani.

I smiled. Leilani had a gift, yes. And now, she finally got the courage to show it.

"You say that I'm just nobody,
Nobody will even notice to see me.
Say I should just be a wallflower.
Not everyone can be the light..."

The huge grin suddenly faded. Her light brown eyes started getting watery and I was afraid if that was the reason. I made a thousand mistakes. Maybe more.

But hurting Leilani was the biggest of them all.

I was the one to call her dwarf. I was the one who teases her style of clothes and I was the one who made everyone not asking out Leilani on any dances, any dates or any hangouts. I was the one who told her to stick to the wall because that's what she was good at and I was the one who started the rumor that Leilani was a nobody.

I started this.

I was brought back to flashbacks. The 'if' moments. If I could have just ignored my ego and say hi to her at the first day we met. If I could have just told her that she was beautiful just the way she was. If I could have just befriended with her instead making out with girls or having a fist bump game with losers.

And...if I could have just bury my narcissistic self forever and just see her smile every single day.

And that's how I knew.

I was falling for Lei.

Author's Note: sorry guys! I know it's short but at least Xander admitted to himself that he's falling for Leilani! *crying full of happy tears*
Anyway...my big exam is in two weeks so I won't be available so much to update my stories. For now, absorb that a jerk has turned into an angel and admitted the good old sentence that we always knew, right?
Wish me luck so I could pass my exam well because I really need it and stay tuned for next chapter!

P.S this story is just the beginning.