How NOT to Write a Fanfic

Clichés and Other Sins

Something that happens far too often in fanfiction is idea-thieving. Maybe you read a fanfic that you like so much that you want to write one with the exact same setting or plot. And hell, it's understandable to want to do that, but it's actually pretty shitty to go through with it. For one thing, it makes you a thief. Being a thief is not cool. Also, if too many people write one fanfic, it becomes overworked and cliché.

Let me come clean about something: I kind of stole the idea for The Scene from beggarsnotes on livejournal. She wrote a fantastic underground club story called Iron, Neon Lights, and Weed. HOWEVER, I made the idea my own. The concept is similar, but I altered the setting hugely to the point where I don't think anybody caught on. It was still shitty of me to steal her idea, but at least I was somewhat original about it. If you're going to steal someone's idea, I can't stop you, but do your best to change it up as much as possible.

And now we get into some renowned clichés. The first one, I've gotten some shit in the past for addressing, but it is absolutely vital that I do so, and I will not apologize for calling you shits out on it.

Self-harm in fanfics is so fucking cliché. Just because something is a common issue in real life doesn't mean it needs to take up an entire plot or subplot of every other story in bandom. And you know what? It's a sad thing. I'm not trying to minimize it. In fact, I've been recovering for almost three years (I'm only saying this publicly so you understand that I'm not just some kid who doesn't get it; and if you ever need tips on curbing the urge, feel free to message me and I'll help you out). But frankly, I don't want to read about Vic being depressed and cutting himself and Jaime being sad because his boyfriend is sad. Depression in general is not a solid basis for a fanfic. You can't convincingly tell me that it's not overworked. And I know a lot of people write to cope with things they deal with, which is fine, but I don't think it's wise to post one of five thousand generic self-harm fics. If you want to address your depression in your writing, do it in a setting besides high school and with issues besides self-harm.

Child abuse, too, is cliché. And, like self-harm, it's really sad and really serious, but that doesn't mean it's okay to include it in your story. It has been written about way too many times, and you can only have so many variations of the same story.

(NOTE: Trigger warnings don't excuse the inclusion of self-harm / child abuse / eating disorders. Yes, part of the issue is the trigger, but aside from these doing nothing to prevent the spread of self-harm culture, it also does nothing to aid the cliché.)

Something to accompany self-harm and depression: mental hospital fics are far too common for any of you to consider starting one. There are a LOT of them already. And don't get me wrong; some of them are really good. But they are cliché. To be honest, hospitals in general are cliché. A lot of people don't plan their stories before they start writing, so when they start running out of ideas, they decide to input some freak accident and get someone into the hospital. Do not do this. Don't even think about it.

(Disclaimer: Someone ends up in the hospital in one of my fics but this was carefully orchestrated and is relevant to the setting and character types).

Something else that is cliché is AHs or non-AUs. (AH = alternate history, AU = alternate universe). In simpler terms, a non-AU is a tour story that could be taking place right this second. An AH would classify as a tour story where current girlfriends don't exist or a band member's past is altered or anything similar. These kinds of stories are actually not all that cool. For one thing, there are a billion of them. Also, it's hard to realistically imagine Mike Fuentes the Ho Supreme Womanizer being cool with sucking Tony's dick. There are way better ideas you could come up with.

Something I've seen a lot in non-AUs is psycho exes. Austin is dating some bitch named Kelli and then decides later to fuck Alan's butt instead of her. Kelli then goes batshit crazy and kidnaps Alan screaming, "If I can't have Austin, no one can!" This is dumb. Don't do this.