Growing Pains

Chapter Fourty-Six

Courtney

"Hi," I said to Justin as I closed the door behind me.

"Hey," he greeted, looking up from the ground. I walked down the three wooden steps, meeting him at the beginning of the stone path that led out towards where my car sat parked under a pillow of snow. I frowned at it, dreading clearing it before we headed out today.

We spoke of simple things for a moment, standing side by side as we walked along the path for a bit, staring out at the pretty pine trees that were now littered with glittering powder. Asking each other about our Christmas presents, discussing the weather, and how lovely the cabin was.

A few minutes had passed before he asked a serious question. "Are you and Duncan?" He trailed off, but I heard the implication.

I frowned, squinting at the sun that was breaking above the tops of the pine trees. That was a question that I had myself. I wasn't sure what we were. I knew there were feelings there, well at least on my side. I had told him as much this morning, but I didn't know where he stood.

He was always with some girl, but I felt like there was something between us that was stronger than his flimsy flings. He could have been using lines on me because of some crush, but I had to believe that Duncan wouldn't do that with me.

"I'm not sure yet, but I think so," I offered. It was the most honest answer I could give him.

"So I'm too late," he said with a humorless chuckle.

I frowned at him. "Don't tell that's why you came up here." If I was the only reason for his impromptu visit, then he would leave broken-hearted.

"I'd be lying if I said it was, but it definitely was encouraging," he said, offering me a side long glance.

"Justin..." I warned, not sure where I was going with my statement.

He brushed me off with a wave. "I always knew." This surprised me, but I tried my best to not let it show. "You never stopped talking about him, and the way he looked at you... I could never compete," he explained. I felt my cheeks heat, but I didn't comment on the matter.

A moment passed and I mustered the courage to ask, "Why?" I turned to face him. He knew what I was asking, I could see it from the pucker and twist of his lips.

"You're perfect, Courtney," he whispered, as soft as the crisp morning breeze. "You're smart, funny, beautiful, strong, and you're going to run the world." He looked at me, "I was so intimidated by all of you that I just..." He shook his head looking down at the ground, a sad look morphing his features. "I just decided it was better to find solace in girls I could contend with. And I'm truly sorry for that. Not to mention, my friends kept egging me on about being with you and I just... I was wrong. It had nothing to do with you. I'm sorry."

I stayed silent for a moment, letting his apology sink in.

"I don't think I have it in me to forgive you today." He nodded at this. "You hurt me really bad, Justin," I admitted. I took a breath then added, "But one day, maybe."

It was the only promise I could give him. I didn't have the strength in me to forgive him today, but one day, I would.

"So why did you come here?" I asked after a lingering breath of cold mountain air. We started walking back towards the cabin, nearing his car.