recollection | ✓

v.

ethereal.

something didn't feel right. the moment the plane had landed her hands began to be clammy, her stomach bubbled with anxiety, and she could not stop herself from clenching her jaw too much. she popped a gum into her mouth and started thinking about the things she was going to do the moment she reached home.

she didn't have to unpack, she only have her backpack with her, so that's taken care of already. all she had to do was leave her things in her room, then she was going to find lisa.

at that thought, her heart began to pick up its pace. thinking hadn't helped with the growing conundrum inside of her, she could feel the roots of the flowers inside her chest grow, reach for something to grasp onto, it constricted jennie's chest.

what if i'll catch her with somebody else?

the root continued to reach deeper, acting like vines this time, it reached down for the butterflies in her stomach, ripping their wings off, leaving them flightless, leading them to death, exchanging them with thorns. thorns began to fill up the space in there.

the closer she got out of the airport, the heavier her feet felt, she suddenly want to turn around and come back to los angeles, she wasn't ready.

her phone startled her, she fished it out from the pocket of her sweats, she read the text message.

from: joo-hyuk
received: 11:14 am
'hey, lil sis, something came up. i can't pick you up. sorry :('

of course, that must be the reason of the anxiety that built up inside of her, her older brother couldn't keep the end of his bargain. she felt a little disappointed, and a bit relieved since no one was going to vex her on the way home.

she opened her phone again and was surprised to see the next message she had received.

from: lili 💜
received: 11:16 am
'you here yet?'

to: lili 💜
from: jennie
delivered: 11:16 am
'yes, i'm on my way out of the airport now. gonna get a lyft.'

from: lili 💜
received: 11:17 am
'don't!!!'

before jennie could even reply to lisa, her phone flashed 'incoming call from lili 💜', a small smile then appeared on her face as she accepted the call.

"you shouldn't get a lyft, just walk!" lisa sounded breathless as if she was running.

jennie took her bag and slung it on her shoulder, "what's it to you?"

"it's more economical to walk."

"yeah, i can't be economical right now, i'm really tired."

then she heard the line ended, which created a crease between her brows, she stared at her phone screen dumbly and as she looked up, lisa was there, in front of her. her heart beat per minute increased. she hadn't expected this, she didn't even go through the motion yet, she had no idea what to say to her. she was supposed to be prepared for this.

a stupid grin was plastered on lisa's face, daisies in her hand, offered to her. jennie reached out for her, instead of taking the daisies, she wrapped her arm around the taller girl, and pressed her face against her chest. lisa reciprocated the hug.

jennie tiptoed a little and placed her face against lisa's neck, she took a whiff of her girlfriend—no, it's ex-girlfriend now, it's been ex-girlfriend for a year—she smelled of cigarettes and that burberry perfume she loved so much.

"i've missed you so much," she whispered to the taller girl, she looked up at her and finally she noticed, "your hair!"

"yeah, you like it?"

"gray, huh?" jennie hummed, "you've been blonde for such a long time."

"i've dyed it months ago, 'wanted a new look." lisa then pulled away from the hug and handed the daisies to her, "c'mon, let's go, your family's waiting for you." lisa took her bag from her, and jennie pressed the daisies against her chest.

she breathed out her nerves, something was off, lisa looked distant. "did they make you pick me up?"

"what?" lisa's brows were furrowed, her hand reached for jennie, and jennie felt her stomach flutter. "'t was my idea. i had to go through joo-hyuk's teasing before he agreed to let me pick you up instead."

"i thought you weren't going to."

"i wanted to surprise you,"

"lisa?"

"hmm?"

"are we okay?"

lisa smiled and didn't answer her.

"i want us to be okay."

still no answer. so jennie stopped from walking, they were in the middle of the parking lot, and she didn't want to fight, that was the last thing she wanted. this summer was all about redemption, winning the love of her life back. she knew she shouldn't be complacent for still having lisa around her orbit, she knew that lisa's other foot was already on its way out, and jennie was determined to pull her back in.

"lalisa, don't you want us to be okay too?"

"i'm still recovering, jen."

this was her fault and she was going to own up to all the hurt she's caused lisa, the only thing was she didn't know where she was supposed to start.

"but, of course, i want us to be okay." lisa then took jennie's hand and wrapped it around her waist. "it's difficult to stay away from you, baby girl." she left a kiss on the top of her head, there went those butterflies again. "you're quite irresistible."

for the nth time, jennie didn't deserve lalisa manoban; there was determination painted all over her face though.

— // —

note:
in which nam joo-hyuk is kim joo-hyuk (joo-hyuk kim).
sorry this is short. vote and comment, or not that's cool too.