Kiwi | Harry Styles

Sixty-Six

Harry

"Do you have any other way to get hold of Jessi?" My Mum asked. I don't know why she thought I'd know.

I haven't spoken to her in two months, have you asked Gem if she knows where she is?" I replied.

"We know where she is but nobody can get a hold of her." My Mum sighed. "Can you try calling her?"

"No. I don't want to talk to her." I sighed.

"Harry!" She scolded, "This isn't just about you. She'd want to be here and Robin would've wanted her here too." I knew she was right, and I didn't want to upset my Mum even more. Unsurprisingly though, Jessi didn't answer my call. "No answer. I'll call Lori." I said as I saw the look on my mum's face. Although I dread to think what she'll be like when she runs out of stuff to busy herself with.

"OK. Thank you." My Mum said before rushing off to do something else. I dialled Lori's number and listened to it ring, part of me was hoping she wouldn't answer either.

"Harry, I'm so sorry. Niall and I are on our way. How you holding up?" Lori answered.

"I'm okay. I'm just trying to look after Mum and Gemma. Listen, do you know how to get a hold of Jessi?" I tried to get her to focus somewhere else. I didn't know how I was. I don't think it had really sunk in that he was gone.

"No, we've been trying. Apparently there's some kind of sandstorm in Iraq at the moment. I'll keep trying. Tell your Mum not to worry." Lori replied, and I almost fell over.

"Sorry, what now?" What the fuck is she doing there?"

"Her and Mickey are photographing some rebuilding work for a story he's involved with. I'll find her though Harry, don't worry." Lori said.

"Don't worry? What if something's happened to her? Why in the hell would you let her go there and with Mickey? The guy's an idiot." I yelled. He couldn't keep her safe if his cowardly little life depended on it.

"Harry, she's tough, she'll be fine. And I'm not her mother. I can't tell her what to do, Listen, I'm going to call Mickey's office and we'll see you soon, yeah?" Lori sounded so calm but I was anything but.

"OK. Well, call as soon as you hear anything." I said.

"I will. Take care of yourself." She said, and we said our goodbyes. I really hoped Jess made it. My mum would be upset if she missed the funeral. And I really hoped she was okay.

-----

Numb. Numb was probably the best way to describe how I was feeling. I watched from the window as the car pulled up outside the house.

"Mum, Ge, you guys ready? The car's here." I straightened out my suit jacket. And that was when my mum started to cry. Gemma spoke to her as I wrapped them both in a hug. I wasn't really tuned in to what they were saying. I almost felt like I was watching from somewhere else.

The drive to the church was quiet. So quiet. Everyone lost in their own thoughts. Nobody had managed to get a hold of Jessi in three days, I knew she'd be disappointed she wasn't here and that made me sad.

The summer breeze seemed chilly when we got out the car and we stood on the steps waiting to go inside. My mum held mine and Gemma's hands and I felt myself crack, I tried to stop it. I had to be strong for them but nothing was working. I would miss him so much.

Jessi

I'd been on the go for almost twenty-four hours, ever since the sandstorm cleared and I got all my messages. I'd got changed and did my makeup at the airport. I was now in a taxi heading to the church, willing the driver to go faster.