Just A Drag No One Wants To Inhale

Every Time

***

The pale winter sun is out, the bitter harsh wind is blowing through the skeleton of the trees, and everyone else in the house is asleep. 

I had the urge to wake Jorden up too, but he looked too peaceful in his slumber, so I thought better than to do that. Because he's probably only at peace with everyone and himself while sleeping.

I am too. Sometimes. It depends on the day. Or night, depending on how you want to look at it. It also depends on the weather, honestly. Seasonal happiness and all that. I don't like it when I dream sometimes. My dreams are fucking weird.

This one dream I had (it was like a month ago or something, but I'll never forget it), I was in the Overlook Hotel, the one in The Shining, and I had a tea party with the creepy twins like we were in Alice In Wonderland. Danny Torrence also joined us, which was fucking weird, and he talked to Tony like he was right across the table from him. And I couldn't see him, no one could. He had full-length conversations with him and I only heard half come out of Danny's mouth... And at the very end of the dream, I turned to where Tony was supposed to be sitting and Willz  was sitting there. He was wearing smudged black eyeliner around his eyes that made his iris' look greener than they actually are, and a black and red dress that looked like it could have come straight out of a Tim Burton  movie. He gave me a Cheshire cat's smile and lifted his teacup towards me.

I tried to open my eyes and wake up, but I couldn't. I was awake, but my eyes didn't open. My body didn't move. I was so scared. I felt this weird laser scan my entire body, starting at my head and slowly (very, very, very  slowly) scanned my entire body until it reached my toes.

That's when I could open my eyes.

Never have I ever woken up so suddenly and drenched in my own sweat before.

But last night, thank Whoever, I didn't have any dreams. It was all black...

That is, until a blinding light shone though my curtains behind my eyelids and a car engine revved outside my window. Either a very good or very bad natural alarm clock.

And here I am now, with Jorden pressed up against my back and his arm draped over my side. Dead weight.

And I'm awake. But he's not. And he snores.

I carefully lifted his arm off me, and he suddenly took in a breath, groaned, and turned away from me. Back to back.

Relieved, I got up and crept downstairs to make enough coffee for everyone in the house to have a cup or two... Including my mother, because after all that drinking she did last night, she probably needs it more than Jorden and I do.

I didn't really need any caffeine in my system in the first place, because as soon as I pulled the blanket off me I was wide awake.

I just need to drink some coffee because it's the only thing that I can taste anymore, which should be a concern but I know the reason why...

Cigarettes.

They kill your taste buds, they turn your teeth and fingertips yellow, and the obvious, it's addictive. I could  just stop cold turkey, but what would Jorden and I do to fill in the silence together?

And I think I read somewhere that coffee and cigarettes stunt your growth if you do it too young...

Whoops.

After I put the filter in, I added in the ground coffee and smelt heaven; I poured in the water and watched the coffee drip into the coffee pot. I did that for a while. A long while. And when around half the coffee was done brewing, I thought that it would be best for me to finally check the time.