Guilt, trust, love

ONE MORE CHANCE

Raman and Ishita were sitting on the couch - Ishita badly crying and Raman consoling her.

I: Kya hum phir ek ho payenge Raman? Does our 'happily ever after' really exist?

R: (gazing intently at her) Of course Ishita. It does exist; as long as we want it to!  And I really want us together... (pauses midway) forever!

I: I... I don't really know what I want Raman. Mujhe apni zindagi par koi kaboo hi nahi hain. Main na khud ko samajh paati hoon, na aapko, na apni zindagi ko.

R: Sirf ek baar, I repeat, sirf aur sirf ek baar, mujhe ek aur mauka de sakti ho?

I: Haven't we done it before? Not once, but many times.

R: Woh saari baatein alag thi yaar. Ishita humara rishta bohot mushkilon se gujra hain, lekin kabhi toota nahi. Lekin main yeh bhi maanta hoon ki is baar se pehle ke problems kaafi chhote the. Shagun humare beech mein aati thi, dushman bankar. But this time, our relationship completely shattered. Galati sirf meri hain Ishita.

I: Don't Raman. Don't blame yourself. Now we don't have anything in our hands for us to blame each other, fight. We have nothing to rectify.

R: No, we do have something very very important to save... to cherish. Humara rishta. Humara HUM!

I: Kya hum use bacha payenge?

R: Umeed pe duniya kayam hain. Aur meri duniya tum ho. Tumse hi toh meri har umeed hain.

I: (blinks her eyes as if to try not crying further)

R: Don't cry. Let bygones be bygones.
     (forwards his hand) Will you give me one more chance to impress you, woo you, surprise          you... probably flatter you... and be with you?

I: (giggling) Are you proposing to me to be your girlfriend?

R: How I love that sound?

I: Which?

R: Of my new-found-girlfriend giggling. So, let's do this.

I: Girlfriend-boyfriend?

R: Yaa.

I: Lekin hum parents hain Raman.

R: Woh bachhon ke liye. Hum Mummy-Papa, Amma-Appa ke bahu, bete, damad-beti hain. Tum Romi, Simmi ki bhabhi, main Mihika, Vandu ka jeeju hoon, I know all of that. Lekin hum ek doosre ke girlfriend-boyfriend toh ban hi sakte hain na?

I: It's exciting! But usse hoga kya?

R: (smiling) Pyaar badhega. And on a more serious note, mujhe lagta hain, ki humare beech conversation missing tha Ishita.

I: You are right Raman. Hum ek doosre ke kuchh bhi hone se pehle ek doosre ke dost the.

R: Naa... Dost nahi, best friends!

I: (smiling) Yaa. So, hum phirse friends bankar ek doosre ko samajhne ki, maaf karke aage badhne ki koshish toh kar hi sakte hain.

R: Right. And bohot saara pyaar bhi kar sakte hain!

I: (blushes)

R: (touching her cheeks) Yeh blush na us din ke liye bacha ke rakhna.

I: Kis din ke liye?

R: Surprise...!!!

I: Raman, please. No more secrets.

R: Yaar, tujhe secret aur surprise ke beech fark nahi pata kya?

I: Isi secret-surprise ke beech jooth bolne padte hain. Jooth se kabhi kuchh achha nahi hota. Vishwas tootta hain aur rishte barbad hote... (words fail in her mouth as she catches Raman's gaze)

R: (with a guilty expression) I am sorry.

I: (stirs uncomfortably on the couch) I didn't mean that... sorry...

R: (taking her hand in his) Ishita, I promise, main tujhe phir kabhi pareshaan nahi karunga, kabhi hurt nahi karunga.

I: Let's not directly go to promises. Koshish karte hian pehle.

R: Matlab?

I: Please try not to hurt me. Baby steps lete hain. Let's learn to walk before we run.

R: Okay. So, main koshish karunga kabhi tumhe hurt na karne ki. Lekin kuchh strict rules bhi hone chahiye.

I: Jaise?

R: Main tumse jooth nahi bolunga. Tumse pehle kisise koi baat confide nahi karunga. You will be first to know every single thing of my life. Mujh par aur meri har cheez par tumhara poora, in fact, mujhse bohot jyada tumhara haq hoga. Main tumhara hamesha khayal rakhunga. Na kabhi tumhe bhooke pet sone dunga, aur na kabhi dawai miss karne dunga. Like a true best friend, I will always listen to what you have to say and whatever you have to say. You will always have my shoulder to cry, to sleep.  You will always have my back...

I: To massage?!

Both laugh.

R: Yes, always!  And by the way, tumne ab tak mere proposal ka jawab nahi diya hain.

I: Are diya toh...

R: Mere tumhe propose karne se saade tera minute tak sirf tum mujhe apna patented lecture de rahi ho. You didn't say yes.

I: Aur agar no kehan ho toh?

R: (face falls) Oh... I thought... But I really want you to say yes. But, agar tum...

I: Yes.

R: (surprised) Yes?

I: Yes! Yes! Yes!

Raman hugged Ishita tightly.

R: (yawns)

I: (hits him playfully on chest) Neend aayi?

R:  Hmm. So, my darling girlfriend, ab so jaye?

I: Yes, boyfriend. Main toh yahin sone wali hoon, couch pe.

R: Kyun? Aisa kyun? Chal na yaar achhe se bed pe so ja na.

I: Nahi baba, bilkul nahi. Main bohot sanskari girlfriend hoon.

R: Pch...

I: Raman, let's take it slow and in a organic way. Pehle bhi humara rishta isi trah gehra hua tha na. So let's take that path again.

R: (hands in air) Okay ma'am. Aapke theories aur logic ke saamne koi tik sakta hain! But can I at least put my you to bed?

Raman made Ishita lay on the couch, covering her with the quilt and wished her goodnight. Both went to sleep waiting for the bright, love-filled morning.