I rant all about not self harming and I still cut myself in the end .
I know I shouldn't but it just makes me feel better about hating myself .
You know what I wish to do ?
I want to grow up into a attractive rich girl and then go to all those people who humiliated me for my looks , called me a slut when I wasn't even close to one and tell them "thanks for making me like this "
I wish I get drunk one day go over to Chris's house , feel his lips on mine for the first and the last time and then slap him hard across his cheek and tell him " I owe you one big time , for all your actions and words that made me who I am now , and that's somebody you would never want to be with.
But I know all this is never gonna happen cause I am a coward , I always was and will always be. I'm a weak person who has no control over her emotions and actions.
This might sound just like a high school crush ,but everything that happened along with it means a lot more .
I hope to become a better person then that what I am now , And make my loved ones proud of me .
That's why I have been so desperate, desperate for something real not those random guys texting me cause they only find my posts pretty.
I'm jealous of all those people who have a loving partner and yet I'm happy for them , cause some people deserve the best , unlike me who deserves nothing, after the person she has moulded herself into.
She really doesn't , yet she is and will always be
Desperate
YOU ARE READING
DESPERATE 💔
Non-FictionShe was desperate for love and care . Even though she had a beautiful life with a loving family.She was desperate ....
