𝐧𝐚𝐫𝐮𝐭𝐨 𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐭𝐬

Kakashi and Team!reader (platonic)

warnings- angsty
i know some of you guys like that angsty shit ;)

Night Mares

(y/n) woke up with a scream on her lips. Her body was coated in sweat and her room felt small. (Y/N) sat up and threw the blankets off of herself, praying that would somewhat help her cool down and feel better but sadly it had little effect on the situation.

"Crap." She wiped her forehead and attempted to stand up, her legs shaking more than they should. She slowly made her way to the kitchen to get a glass of water.

The (s/c) girl slumped down on the floor with her back against the bottom cabinet and attempted to control her heartbeat, it made her feel like she was running a mile or something.

In one, hold three, four, repeat. She kept this small pattern going through her mind as she tried to control her ragged breathing.

Two weeks in a row, why can't these dreams stop? I'm probably bothering my team and Sensei because i've been so unfocused and out of it.

(y/n) closed her eyes and tilted her head back and when she opened her eyes she was looking at her familiar white cabinet. "I'm sorry I couldn't help any of you , I'm sorry I let you guys get hurt." (y/n) sounded broken and she didn't even care that her voice cracked or that she was talking to a cabinet. She wanted these words off of her chest.

Hot fat tears started to leak from her eyes and slip down (y/n)'s face and she couldn't bring herself to wipe them away. I probably deserve this, I froze up i didn't know what to do i was scared and everyone got hurt because of me. Im dragging my team down because I'm not the best and I have no right to even be on the team anymore im just dead wei-

"(y/n)? Where are you? " You are late to training again" Kakashi sensei walked farther into the house, immediately seeing how distressed his student looked.

(y/n) quickly wiped her eyes and turned towards the silver haired man. "Sorry Kakashi sensei, i-i didn't realize it was morning already, just give me a minute to collect myself and get ready." Thinking her sensei had left her to get ready the (s/c) girl pulled her legs up, hugging her knees and resting her head along them.

She was surprised when her Sensei came and sat next to her on the floor, "nightmares?"

Her head slowly came up surprised (once again) that he figured it out so quickly.

She nodded and Kakashi wrapped his arm around the shaking genin. (y/n) snuggled closer to Kakashi and mumbles "how did you know?"

"When I was your age I would do the same thing when I got terrible nightmares, I also started to notice how you looked tired and seemed sluggish whenever we would train. Considering you're really advanced for a genin it was worrisome to see you being slow for the past week I figured something had to be up. Nightmares aren't fun and I understand why you wake up because of them."

(y/n) gave the older man a small nod, "do you want to tell me about that? Well the nightmares."

That one questioned made (y/n)'s eyes go wide. Was she ready to tell someone about her nightmares? What would Kakashi Sensei think? Would he view her as the weakest link because her mind turned her insecurities into dreams?

(y/n) swallowed. Kakashi won't judge, right? He'll understand, after all he probably deserves to know since I made them halt training for being late again..

"Every single dream is the same." (y/n) avoided Kakashi's gaze and she sat up away from the older man. "It always starts with my family. I'm sitting on the floor of my bedroom my family crowded around me, staring at me with cold eyes. My voice is gone and It feels like I can't move like im paralyzed , I'm stuck to one single place. Then one by one they start to talk, getting closer every time they tell me what they hate about me and how I bring our team down and how i could have helped and prevented my family and the team from getting hurt. Everyone is telling me how worthless I am and that I shouldn't have become a ninja and be on the team and I mean everyone. My mother, My father, My brothers and sisters, Hell even my teammates showed up (kakashi's team) and even you. You all look me in the eye as much as i want to look away i cant because im stuck and I can just see the disappointment leaking from everyone's eyes and I know I can do better but it's never enough nothing I ever do is enough." She wiped her eyes again and continued on. "Then finally im able to speak my voice becomes gravely and it hurts to speak and I beg you all to stop, and you do disgust plastered on all of your faces. Yet you all walk away and by the time I can finally move my legs and get up you're all so far away and no matter how fast I run I can never catch you guys it always feels as if no matter how close i got the area around me always got bigger and you guys always got farther.. Then the scenery changes and I'm back on my couch in my old house, and I see my family again. I see them and they look disgusted and angry with me. My mother cries and tells me I wasn't strong enough to save them from the fire, and they say what makes them think im going to become a ninja, she's screaming at me, telling me that I should have died in the fire too and how she never loved me. My dad is upset because I didn't do anything to save the family and he calls me selfish for freezing up and watching everyone burn without a reason. My siblings are angry because they blame me for the fire without a reason, they don't need one and I feel like maybe it was my fault, because I was never at home always gone somewhere exploring and- and maybe just maybe if i didn't freeze up and if I was there the fire wouldn't have happened and my family would still be here. They're all disappointed and I can't shake the feeling that it's all true. That everyone actually thinks this about me."

Kakashi stunned and wide eyed shook his head and pulled the shaking girl closer to him again. " (y/n), you do know that nobody thinks any of those things right? You're a valuable and loved member of the team and we're here to support you and be there for each other. Sure you may not be the amazing at everything but that's why we have a team. Each of us are good at something and bad at the other, we all have our strengths and weaknesses, not just you. I also don't think that your family hates you, I don't know what you were told but they know that you couldn't help it, you were to young and it's only natural for someone your age to freeze up like that. I think they are happy. Happy that even though you suffered from that experience that you were able to put it all aside and make friends and find people that love you for you"

(y/n) wiped her eyes for what felt like the 100th time this morning, her skin around her eyes becoming raw and red, and tilted her head and giving Kakashi a small smile, "you mean that?"

Kakashi nodded and patted (y/n)'s head, "of course. Now let's go get ready for training, i'll wait right here for you."

(y/n) stood with Kakashi. "Okay. oh and Kakashi sensei? thank you for listening, it's been a long time since someone has cared for me and decided to help" she smiled and went to her room to get dressed.

Kakashi responded with a laugh and sat down on a chair in the kitchen, a closed eyed smile plastered on his face, he'd never say it out loud but he cares for her as if she was his own child. He sees similarities between the both of them from when he was younger, he finally decided that he's going to protect this little girl with his life.

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by- ME !

i was working on this for a while and i really hope you enjoyed it !

Lmk what ya think :)

ok bye bye !! <3