Denial

Closure.

I'm tired.
Tired of the way that you walk into the room without thinking twice while I suffer from the heavy burdens you placed upon me.
And when I enter, I see you.
Enjoying life and making progress.
More progress made in 20 minutes than I've made this whole year.
I suffocate in my own worries, leaving myself to burn.
Intoxicated in my unwilling illusions.
Nothing will change, there is no escape in my fate.
Stagnant in this pool of doubts, what have I become?
The words you told me, still ringing in my ears. In need of a break.
We roam around the hallways, laughing from the top of our lungs.
Our words sing sweet nothings.
But what are we?
After all these months, we have solely come full circle.
Back to square one.
No talk of feelings was ever uttered among our virtuous smiles.
No questions were ever answered in the midst of conversation.
My heartfelt pleads of agony were only defined whispers.
And till this very day my emotions are like fragile glass.
One scream and I'm broken, my strength keeping me in check.
Your firm disposition is all I've ever known, not giving anything away.
I just want things to be clear, so I can put this all behind me.
Like when the moon fades into azure bliss.
I am sick of holding onto the past.
Lies still pile onto my heavy heart.
Craving liberation.
I experience all this pain, while you have remained in the same state as the year has passed.
And I cannot take this anymore.
So talk to me, as I don't know how to tell you without risking our friendship once again.
I just want
Closure.
(is that too much to ask??)