Obsession

Chapter 7

I've been pacing my bedroom all morning, trying to think of how I'm going to convince Kai, whom I've never touched in real life, to shake my hand. I've got one shot at making this work. Once I touch the stone, it's do or die.

My stomach is in knots. I keep going over all the things that could go wrong, all the things that could go right, and of course, if this is even going to work at all. At one point, I was convinced that this magical rock was going to save me. Now, I'm wondering why I ever thought shaking someone's hand while holding a rock is going to change anything. Am I really that naive? Has my sad, pathetic love life seriously come down to a rock?

A rock?

A rock...

The more I think about it, the dumber it sounds. The only reason I'm even willing to attempt it is because I honestly just need the closure. If this stupid rock doesn't work, then maybe I can convince my Kai-wired brain to re-wire itself and let me start living my life. I'm a twenty-one year old college student with the whole world at my feet. One way or another, I'm going to start living, with or without Kai.

I place the red box that contains the stone in my bag and start out the door. My nerves are getting the best of me, so I decide against breakfast or even coffee this morning and instead, head straight to class.

I won't see Kai until after lunch, so I try to focus on my lectures.

It's easier said than done though. My mind has been saturated by him ever since that dream. I can't stop thinking about how perfect his arms felt wrapped around me; the way his smooth, deep voice made my heart race.

"Miss Thaxton?"

I snap out of my thoughts and look up at my professor. "Yeah?"

The people around me begin to snicker. My face flushes red with embarrassment, but I try to play it off. "Sorry, Dr. Kahn. I wasn't paying attention."

"Yes, I know," he replies dryly. "Which is exactly why I'm choosing you to be my guinea pig for this experiment."

My mouth drops open in shock when he hands me an envelope. I have no idea what's in it or what I'm supposed to be doing with it since my head was in the clouds. I take it from him and stare at him in confusion, waiting for him to explain. When he turns and walks away, I quietly open up the envelope and unfold the paper that's inside.

No social media of any kind for one month, starting today.

I sigh in relief. I can do that. It may be hard, but maybe it'll force me to reply to texts more often. My friends are always complaining that I never text them back.

"Okay, class, after Miss Thaxton's experiment is over, she's going to give us a brief overview of how this changes the way she communicates with her friends, her family and her peers. Each of you will then turn in an essay on the pro's and con's of social media on today's society," Dr. Kahn says.

He gives me a look as if he's looking forward to the torture he's about to put me through. Little does he know, I have plenty of ways that I torture myself on a daily basis. Much more cruel things that have way more ramifications than a social media fast.

After class is over, I head out to meet Rue and Anna on the quad to decide where we'll eat lunch. I spot Anna first, concentrating on her phone. Her bright red hair makes her hard to miss.

"Where's Rue?" I ask, walking up to her.

"Oh, she's working on some extra credit for her chemistry lab. It was on her Snap story," she says without looking up at me.

"Uh, Dr. Kahn is making me fast from social media for a month as part of an experiment."

She looks up at me in horror. "Oh my God, that is so sad. Why would he do that?"

"I hope you're joking."

"Mara, social media is your life! You have thousands of followers that are waiting for your next great dance video!"

I roll my eyes. "It'll be fine. Besides, I desperately need an A in his class. If I have to fast social media to do that, then so be it."

She opens her mouth to say something else, but her eyes suddenly move behind me and widen in surprise. "There's Kai!" she whispers.

I freeze up in panic and first, but I'm too determined to make this stone thing work to let this moment pass me by. I look at Anna and take a deep breath. I take the red box out of my bag and pull the sleeve of my shirt down over the palm of my hand to take the stone from the box without touching it.

Without warning, Anna pushes me to the ground. I land on my back, knocking the wind from my lungs. I squeeze my eyes shut and cry out in pain, ready to give Anna a piece of my mind. But then I see him; he's standing right over me, reaching out his hand to help me up.

I let the stone fall to the palm of my hand and reach up to take Kai's hand. His eyes meet mine and my heart skips a beat. I'm dumbfounded. Baffled. Completely out of it.

"Drop it!" Anna shouts.

I quickly let go of Kai's hand and the stone falls to the ground.

Kai looks between Anna and me suspiciously. "Are you okay?" he finally asks me.

"Yeah," I reply breathlessly. "Sorry about that."

He gives me a simple nod before pulling his headphones back over his ears and walking away. I stand in stunned silence, watching him leave.

"Aunt Roma said you should see immediate results," Anna says, watching him with me. "Maybe it didn't work."

I look down at the ground and see the stupid rock that I foolishly believed was going to make Kai fall in love with me. I bend over and pick it up, holding it up to Anna's face. "No, it didn't work, because this is stupid! Your aunt is full of shit. Whatever happened between your parents was just a coincidence. There was never any kind of magical love potion tea and there was never a stupid magical rock!" I shout, throwing the stone across the quad.

Anna's eyes begin to tear up and I immediately regret everything I said. I close my eyes and sigh. "I'm sorry. None of this was your fault. You were only trying to help me. Both you and Rue have always tried to help me. I'm the one with the problem. I'm the one with this crazy obsession."

Anna reaches out and touches my arm, giving me a sympathetic smile. "Maybe it's time you move on. I happen to know that Leo really likes you. Every time I'm around him, you're all he talks about."

I smile when I think about Leo. He's so sweet. And charming. And sexy as hell. Best of all, he acknowledges my existence. I have to admit, there is real chemistry between us. I feel it, even if I don't want to admit it.

"Maybe you're right. It's time to move on," I say looking over my shoulder. Kai is long gone by now, but some part of me is hoping that maybe he'll come back. Maybe that stupid rock worked after all.

I laugh at myself for being so naive. It's taken me way too long to realize just how much time I've wasted on someone who has never shown any kind of interest in me. I let my obsession drive me to a point of madness. Pure, unadulterated madness. I don't even know who I am without Kai, even though there was never even an us. I will have to move on from him as if I lost him, even though I never had him.

But from this day forward, I vow to get myself together. I'm going to focus on school, dancing and winning this competition for my mom's sake. I'm going to be a good friend. I'm going to be happy and smile more often. I'm going to be a new me.

A better me.