Night Changes

day 2

𝐢'𝐦 𝐨𝐧𝐥𝐲 𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐚𝐰𝐚𝐲
𝐢'𝐥𝐥 𝐛𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐝𝐚𝐲

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“Shivaay, you should really come out of your nest”, Aditya screamed on the phone, but I  knew better than to hold it close to my phone.

“I don't want to”, I simply answered and hung up. Aditya had always been good at interactions and going out. It came easy to him.

I wondered what he would've done if he knew I tried to kill myself. I didn't like the idea of him knowing. He would've burned down the whole world. Aditya and I had known each other since childhood. He was my best friend and I, his. One could easily say, he was like my brother from another mother.

Well, not really another mother. Ms. Hooda had been very kind to me. When after my father's death, my mother abandoned me, she took me in. They all made me feel like home. There was just one problem.

It wasn't my home.

As though they made me feel welcomed, a part of me knew, I didn't belong to them. I was just another burden. A useless thing my mother decided to throw away, because it reminded her of her husband. The husband she loathed.

“Tztztz, Cleo, aren't we a bunch of loners”, I walked over to her and fed her. I sat down in front of the TV, but there was nothing interesting to watch.

So, after lunch, I decided to take a walk. There were many people out in the afternoon, which was a blessing for me. I decided to walk to the park nearby. It was made for kids.

My earphones were my savior. I couldn't survive a moment without them. I looked around and decided to sit at the loneliest bench in the park. From there out, I could see a bunch of kids playing.

I was watching them attentively, when something made me startle. Well, not something but rather a certain someone. I took out my earphones and turned to that rude person. My eyes widened when I realized it was her.

“We keep bumping into each other”, she giggled and took a seat beside me. Anika was sitting very close, so close that it made my stomach feel giddy.

“Say something, I'm giving up on you”, she smiled and even though she meant them as a joke, something inside me decided to take them seriously.

“I don't like people talking to me”, I told her and she looked at me, with her eyebrows furrowed.

“I know that”, she whispered to herself, but I was blessed with good ears, so I heard it and I turned to her. She was playing with the sand.

I didn't ask her how or why.

“You shouldn't do that”, she said and looked up, her eyes set on the kids playing together.

I stared at her, in hope she'd get what I was doing and thank God she did. She didn't seem very cheerful today.

“Shut down. Lock yourself up”, she whispered and I looked away. Anika didn't know me, then why was she acting like she did.

“You don't know me”, I answered in a harsh tone, Anika shifted hesitantly. And I just wanted to vanish at that moment.

“I'm sorry”, she apologized and was about to leave, when I unexpectedly grabbed her wrist. Anika turned her head to me and looked at my hand around her wrist. I stared at it for a moment, before pulling it back.

“I just don't like it”, I told her and she looked at me, before taking a seat beside me again. Anika was fiddling with fingers.

“Do you want to be my friend?”, she asked me softly, with so much hope in her eyes. I gulped and looked into her eyes. I didn't like being rude.

I didn't know what to say. And soon her eyes started growing sadder. Anika's shoulder hung low. I felt bad. I didn't know how to care for others. I could barely do it for myself.

“Maybe”, I told her and she suddenly perked up. Anika had a huge smile on her face, again. She looked at me.

“Do you mean it?”, she tried to confirm and all I could think of was how happy she seemed. I just nodded in reply.

“Why do you want to be my friend?”, I asked her curiously, while walking back home. Anika was walking by my side. She shrugged her shoulders.

“Because I like you”, she answered very straightforwardly and my heart skipped a beat. My eyes widened and I looked at her. She was smiling very bright.

“Do you like me?”, she asked me and I looked away. Anika was very optimistic. I wasn't sure if I liked that. And the fact that she blurted out whatever came to her mind, was a bit... weird.

“Maybe”, I answered and looked at her. She pouted sadly and I wanted to take back my words, but then her face lit up again like a Christmas tree.

“That's ok! That only means we have to spend a lot of time together”, she clapped her hands like a kid and for a second I wanted to roll my eyes at her innocence.

“You're weird”, I muttered and she turned her head to me. Anika started laying, but the real kind of laughing. Where you clutch your stomach. I looked at her confused.

“People tell me that a lot”, she said between her laughs and I suddenly felt very overwhelmed by her presence.

“Don't you know that this is very creepy? I could be anything... a serial killer”, I told her and she stopped laughing. I scratched the back of my neck.

“No, you're not. I know that for sure”, she said and I felt bad, again. For someone who barely knew me, she sure acted like we had been friends forever.

“Give me your phone”, she forwarded her hand and I looked at it. Then at Anika. She glared when I didn't do anything. I sighed and took out my phone.

I placed it on her stretched palm. Anika opened my phone and started typing something on it. I had no password. There wasn't anything to hide.

“Here, now you have my number”, she said grinning and I slowly took back my phone. We started walking again.

And from time to time, we'd glance at each other.
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Amna xx