Lovely » Zedward [Discontinued]

Chapter 43

I need to admit.. there are times where I'm forcing myself to write. Like it's supposed to be done, not enjoyed. I don't take my time. So if my updates are slow, it's either that^, or because I'm uninspired. I'm trying to find that inspiration and school is right around the corner.

My writing is becoming more and more shitty every day that's passing by. But I'm very grateful for those who still take their time to read this book. I'm sorry, xx.

- A

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There was a burning sensation of regret, and at the same time a rush of adrenaline filled his veins. Zayn didn't know how long he stood there, or how long his angry tears mixed with the rain, but he couldn't give a damn about that. Not a single bit.

Why was he so stupid? Zayn had no reason to say what he said to the broken, sad boy. Who knows where Edward could be, and Zayn bit back a loud cry when flashes of Edward soaking wet in the rain, on his knees, crying his heart out came to his mind.

They were doing so well, they were happy, had no troubles at all. He just had to ruin it, didn't he?

Zayn noticed how jumpy and nervous Edward seemed nowadays. Every noise made made him either flinch, or  jump back, and Zayn didn't miss the evident fear in his eyes every time. There were a lot of changes Zayn has seen about Edward. Edward barely spoke to him these past few weeks, and it's one of the reasons why he was a ticking bomb, that just exploded a few hours back.

The color Edward's skin once had, was gone, white covering his body, as he looked like a stunning, yet fragile China doll. One wrong move, he'd be broken into pieces within a few minutes.

And that's what happened just now. Zayn's frustration got the best of him, and he took it out on the one person he swore he'd never hurt. The one who he promised himself to protect, yet he was the one who's causing his pain. Zayn wouldn't really be suprised to find out if Edward didn't trust him enough to tell him at least something now.

Trust was something you can earn by being patient with someone. It was valuable, though it was also very delicate and breakable. At the same time, it's very easy to lose.

Feeling drowsy, and knackered, Zayn walks away from the wet, grassy field, heart aching, darkness enveloping his shaky figure, the rain pouring heavily every step he took. Hot tears mixed with cold water, fingers twitching.

The night included his mother asking him persistently on where he was, and why he didn't think ahead and bother to bring an umbrella with him because of the bad weather they were having. That night consisted of him sobbing against his sheets, guilt and sorrow not leaving him any time soon.

He could only hope that the green eyed boy was safe and unharmed. Because Zayn wouldn't know what to do with himself if he let him get hurt.

Or if he was the reason why Edward was hurt in the first place..

After hours and hours of pain and tears, and a seemingly never ending restless evening, his eyes finally began to droop, and before he knew it, he was already sucked into a dreamless, pitch black slumber...

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As Edward stumbled into his small apartment, his soaking wet clothes made a large puddle under his feet. Shivering, he pulls off his jacket, then his shirt. Zayn's words were still circling inside of Edward's mind. He couldn't put the blame on Zayn, because he understood why it was so annoying for your boyfriend to hide things from you. Zayn just wanted to know what's wrong so he could help Edward. The brunette didn't exactly deserve his help, but he accepted it anyway.

Whatever they had, Edward didn't want it to fall apart, leading to Zayn leaving him.

He didn't want to be alone..

Not again.

Everything seemed so out of place, and that made Edward's anxiety rise. Zayn and him being together, maybe they weren't meant to be. Maybe it's because they're too different from one another, and they should've seen it coming. How could Zayn even like Edward if the lad hated himself?

Edward had a lot of doubts, their kisses frequently initiated by Zayn, and if he was the one who wanted to do it, there would be hesitance. It was as if he didn't trust the Bradford native, but he did. He really did, with all of his heart.

Nothing made sense to Edward at all that night. There was still a presence lurking around, and he could feel their gaze. The rain didn't slow down, stop, or lighten.

The swoosh of the wind could be heard, as it passes by his building loudly. It seemed like the weather was only getting worse as minutes went by. Just great for how Edward was feeling.

He felt like shit.

Catching a glimpse of trees swaying roughly, leaves falling onto the puddles on the ground. To make matters worse, a sudden noise of the thunder made Edward jump and whimper. Walking to his room, he grabs a lavender sweater, boxers, and a pair of grey, comfy sweat pants. Stepping into his bathroom, he pulls at his towel, and dries his wet curls. After drying himself, he changes into his dry clothes, and puts his dirty ones in the laundry basket.

Sighing softly, he lays on his uncomfortable bed, blanket draped across his body. The night was going by very slowly, and Edward hated that. And he just remembered that tomorrow was Monday, which meant he had to face Zayn, and go to his boring, pointless classes.

But he cleared his mind, laying there, silence irritating his senses. Edward had to tell Zayn at some point, even if it was hard to. As much as Zayn could be sweet, loving, and gentle with him, he can be really stubborn and determined. Those moments didn't often happen. They only occured when they were trapped inside the janitors closet at school, no, when Zayn dragged him into the room, that time where Zayn was absolutely livid, and the recent event.

What was he thinking right now? Edward pondered. Was he thinking of breaking up with him? Will he ignore him the next day they'd be at school? What if —

There was a knock on the door that startled Edward, making him practically leap out of his bed, and land on the hard, wooden floor. Groaning in pain, he straightened himself, and walked to answer the door. What suprised him was who was behind it, going up to his place at almost eleven in the evening.

When the door opened, he felt likd the air was knocked out of him, breath hitched, and caught up in his throat.

Why was he here?

"What are you doing here?" Edward hardened his once shocked expression, tension filling the atmosphere.

"I want to talk to you. Please."

"I think you have the wrong place, sir." Edward said lowly, before he went to close the door shut.

To Be Continued ...

Word Count: 1.19k

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