Dark Dreams

FASTER THAN THE SPEED OF LIGHT

I stood in front of the bathroom mirror. I grimaced, baring my teeth like an angry rapper.

"You can do it," I said, jumping up and down. "No, I can't."

An expression of resignation appeared on my face, which was paler than usual.

It was six in the morning of November 30. The day that would go down in the history of the Blooms as the day on which I failed to get my family out of the pit of social shame.

I looked with pity at my reflection. I was wearing a gray t-shirt that was so old that it was now shapeless. Printed on it was a cat wearing glasses with a lightning bolt on its forehead, and the words "Hairy Pawter". Maya had bought it for my birthday. When she was around I'd loved this shirt, but now I thought it was stupid. Light jeans with turn-ups and a khaki sweatshirt complemented my very basic look. I picked up my hairbrush, trying to figure out how to give some shape to my hair, which that day was sticking out in every direction and looked completely wild. I gave up without even trying. I was going to do my usual braid when I told myself that it wasn't worth styling my hair for my last day at Union Hills. No daisies in my hair or clothes that day; I wanted to leave my dad out of my failure.

I placed my glasses on my nose, noticing that the lenses hid, though only slightly, the dark circles that the nightmares of the last few weeks had given me. I sprayed on a ton of vanilla perfume, one of those scents that cost three dollars in supermarkets because they're full of toxic ingredients.

I smiled faintly at my reflection before I went out as if to tell myself that I had no choice but to go to school.

As I was skating to school, I put on my headphones to listen to Jimmy Manosh, the creator of the You are important app. I chose the first audio file, entitled "Today is a perfect day to love".

"Hello, dear friends. I'm Jimmy Manosh," said the recorded voice in a terribly honeyed and annoyingly calm voice. "If you downloaded this app it's because, basically, you already know that you are important, but very likely you just need someone to help you remember why you are."

I don't know why, but I imagined him swathed in a yellow aura as though the sun was always behind him, and with an almost disturbing smile perpetually printed on his face.

"Don't you want to live a life in which your inner self is fully realized and appreciated?" continued the man. "You'll be surprised to see how repeating some simple movements and phrases a few times a day will make the life you're living finally become your life."

I was momentarily distracted as I passed the best bakery in town, where some fragrant croissants with peach jam had just come out the oven.

"Let's start with something simple," he went on cheerily. "Look in the mirror or simply say aloud as you walk: I love myself. Articulate the words clearly and add your name: I, Jimmy Manosh, l-o-v-e m-y-s-e-l-f".

Just the idea of yelling "Sarah Bloom, I love you" made me close the app in a hurry. It wasn't surprising that Jimmy loved himself. With that bank account, I'd love me, too.

I reached my destination with Nicki Minaj ringing in my ears - besides being far less annoying than Manosh, it was the perfect soundtrack to the scene in front of me.

Parked alongside the sidewalk in front of the Union Hills gate was a car that looked like it was from the latest Fast and Furious movie.

An intense shade of red paint that I had never seen before, matt black wheels and accessories, large vents in the bodywork and a unique rear spoiler completed the look of a two-seater convertible. Anyone who saw it would want to take at least one photo of to show friends.