Pheobis's Journal

Entry 4

{{^^^If you have fan art for this book I will gladly put it above^^^}}(I rarely update any books and luckily happened to remember I have this.)

Well I slept and that was normal, I wish I could have slept the day away like Nectar did yesterday, but my internal clock woke me up a bit early for my liking. In other words right on time. And when I woke up I couldn't find Nectar, I freaked out. ALOT. Yet I did see her out the window fluttering around, I'd recognize those red wings anywhere, I bet flying is a good way to clear your head. I'll probably always have a fear of flight and ... I guess by extension a bit of a fear of heights, because of the incident. But that's fine it's not like I'll be able to fly any time soon. Maybe I'll get over it.

I went back to where she'd been asleep and the food was still untouched, it was probably cold. I don't blame her for not eating it, but she should eat something it's unhealthy to not eat at all. Either way hopefully Helix's mother won't come by today, but hopefully Glossamer and Ares will.

I'm bored but I don't want to leave the house. Well technically yeah it's a apartment in a hive and not a house all on its own, but I still call it a house. It's not really up in the webs. It's also not really a apartment. It is a abode right between being treestuff and being silk, but it is comfortable than pure treestuff and more stable than the silk above. At least in my opinion.

Today I debated if I could dress as a Hivewing, I mean there's not much else to think about. Well actually there's a lot more I could think about but don't want to. I'm yellow enough that I wouldn't need much paint. I'd only need black paint and a bit of yellow to cover up my more orange scales.

I definitely need to ask Gloss and Ares if I should.

Originally when the idea of dressing up as a Hivewing drifted through my mind I felt like I was going to throw up. It's their fault my father is d̶ e̶a̶- GONE. Why should I parade around as one of the dragons that caused his ̶d̶̶̶̶̶e̶̶̶̶̶m̶̶̶̶̶i̶̶̶̶̶s̶̶̶̶̶e̶̶̶̶̶ disappearance. Why should I even have to be near them? Why did ̶h̶̶a̶̶v̶̶e̶̶ ̶̶t̶̶ø̶̶ ̶̶d̶̶i̶— -

No no I'm drifting off topic and I'm crying again and getting worked up.

Originally I was disgusted by the idea of dressing up as a Hivewing. Yet the more I thought about it (I couldn't get it out of my head) the more I liked the idea.

•I could get back at them. Prank them or something along similar lines.
•I could go to places Silkwings aren't usually allowed.
•I ̶c̶̶o̶̶u̶̶l̶̶d̶̶ ̶̶a̶̶c̶̶t̶̶ ̶̶l̶̶i̶̶k̶̶e̶̶ ̶̶a̶̶ ̶̶i̶̶d̶̶i̶̶o̶̶t̶̶ ̶̶a̶̶n̶̶d̶̶ ̶̶l̶̶e̶̶a̶̶v̶̶e̶̶ ̶̶m̶̶o̶̶r̶̶e̶̶ ̶̶S̶̶i̶̶l̶̶k̶̶w̶̶i̶̶n̶̶g̶̶s̶̶ ̶̶w̶̶i̶̶t̶̶h̶̶ ̶̶a̶̶ ̶̶b̶̶a̶̶d̶̶ ̶̶i̶̶m̶̶p̶̶r̶̶e̶̶s̶̶s̶̶i̶̶o̶̶n̶̶ ̶̶o̶̶f̶̶ ̶̶t̶̶h̶̶e̶̶ ̶̶H̶̶i̶̶v̶̶e̶̶w̶̶i̶̶n̶̶g̶̶s̶ Nope that's just me being a idiot. I'd get caught.
•I could be places after curfew.
•I could be a complete ̶a̶̶̷̶̶$̶̶̷̶̶ ̶̶̷̶̶ś̶̶̷̶̶ ̶̶̷̶̶̶̶̶̷̶ JERK to Silkwings I dislike..... which is pretty much no one.
•I could talk back to Hivewings without getting in as much trouble.
•Most importantly I could try and get my mother a raise. Get her to be treated better. And I could actually be listened to about my opinion when trying to talk to Helix's mother.

Ok in all honesty I just thought of the last bullet point now! Now I really want to do it!

But I can't be the one to buy the paint. It would be on record that I had and a odd Hivewing prancing about could be linked back to me. I'd have to ask Gossamer or Ares to get it because then I wouldn't be as much of a suspect. With jewelry and adornments I'd be able to costume myself to look even more Hivewing, a little crown to cover the antenna for example.

I'm not quite sure how I'd get away without having wings. Maybe we could make some false ones and cover them with some semi translucent material so it's clear that they're there but it isn't easy to tell that they're fake.

Wow I guess I'm really planning this out.