The Sovereign

ELEVEN | Hope | ELEVEN

We understand how dangerous our masks can be. We all become what we pretend to be

~ • 《⚜》• ~

Alyra Kassia Ambrose

H O P E

♧

Falling to my death was nothing like I ever expected. In my mind I imagined it falling down for hours with my life flashing before my eyes and darkness met me at the end. Feeling the rush of wind against my hair, the mix of dread, peace and adrenaline in my blood.

If only it was like that.

Instead, I crashed within seconds with darkness meeting me at the end. I had hoped to lose consciousness, but then I woke up seconds after crashing. I can feel my broken bones, my shattered spine, the forming bruises all over my body.

The pain was blinding as I laid on my back. I continued to stare up to the sky with tears still falling down my eyes. I spent the next minutes hearing my bones reform and muscles spasms all over my body.

It was painful. It was torture for hours, but it was enough to shred the anger from inside of me. Leaving nothing else but pain and self loathing as I laid helplessly on the ground, hearing the grinding formation of bones against my ears as they pop back into place.

The pain dulled my senses but it was still strong enough to pick up the light feathered footsteps slowly approaching from my south. He stopped within an eye distance as I feel his eyes hovering over my body. Feeling the rush that followed the trails of his eyes as he inspected every inch of my broken body.

And he stayed there, just staring at my pain with what I can imagine was a stoic face.

"Surprise, surprise. I'm still alive." I chuckle dryly, airing out a broken cough as I spoke.

"I should've just fucking died." I glared up at the sky with my bitter tone. My train of thoughts hammering images of what could have been if I simply disappeared. It wasn't even that hard anymore. Nobody knows where I am or what happened to me. I could simply die now and no one would ever find me again.

Maybe then, everyone would be safe from me.

"You know, I was human once." It felt like the forest fell silent as I spoke the words. Letting the trees hear the secret I have long kept. It's been days- weeks since that night. I knew it in myself that I was no longer the same ever since, but I never got to accept the fact that my life was never gonna be the same again.

I still felt human inside. I still want to be human, but I'm not anymore and I can't keep acting like I am. The more I do, the more that things gets out of hand.

"I was, and I actually enjoyed being one." The physical pain faded in my mind as the emotional pain struck inside of my chest.

"I enjoyed running through the forest and getting cuts and bruises everytime I fall. I enjoyed getting tired, getting weak, hell I even enjoyed getting sick." My fingers popped as I closed them into a fist. I closed my eyes, imagining those days where I could still feel the sting of cuts against my skin, aches of bruises deep to the tenders of the bone.

I enjoyed the pain of being human.

I enjoyed being human.