Story of A Lonely Guy

Chapter 17: Gone

"Hello?” I say into the phone trying to cover my surprise.

"Brone..?” I hear her whisper.

"Yes?"

"She's gone...” she says as her voice begins to crack at the pronunciation of the word ‘gone’.

I glance over at Jade just as she gives me a look resembling the thought: Well? What the hell's going on?

"What? Angela, who’s gone?"

"My grandma. I went over a few days ago like I usually do after going out to buy her groceries and found her lying motionless on the kitchen table. Her head was fallen over face down on the table, her arms dangling by her sides, lifeless. I can't do it, Brone. I couldn't do anything. I shook her and shook her, hoping that somehow she'd wake up and tell me she fell asleep... but, she didn't. The funeral home just called me to schedule her funeral and I couldn't respond. I just broke. "

"Angela, it's alright. I'll be there soon. Don't do anything rash,” I tell her reassuringly.

"Okay...” she says quietly before hanging up the phone. I put mine down in my lap, throwing my head against the back of the seat breathing a heavy sigh.

"Well?” she says. "Why is she calling you?"

"Her grandma passed away recently. I have to go check on her. I know it's unexpected, Jade. But, I can't just sit there and watch her reaching out for help and not go to her. Will you drive me to her house?” I ask her.

She takes a deep breath, obviously annoyed. She's not heartless, so I know she's bound to say yes.

"Alright, fine. I'm not that bad of a person. Give me the directions and I'll get there as fast as I can."

Half an hour later, we're pulling into Angela's rundown driveway.

~

When I open the front door, I see Angela sprawled out on the couch, crying silently to herself. She hears the wood beneath my feet creek and stirs a bit before sitting up slowly.

"Ang?" I say.

"What?” she says with her face buried in the blanket, cradling it in her hands.

"Are you alright?"

"What the fuck do you think? The last person that actually means anything to me just died. How would you be doing?"

I glance at Jade and she rolls her eyes before going to stand by the couch. I follow behind and go to sit beside Angela. As the couch shifts under my weight, I throw my arm around her shoulders to attempt to comfort her.

"I know it's hard, Ang. It's supposed to be. Everything will be fine. You just need to try and get yourself together and make an effort to move on from this. It'll all work out in the end,” I tell her softly.

She nods as she begins to sob into her hands.

Jade and I look at each other, unsure of how to fix anything. It seems that tragedies follow Angela like a shadow. Sometimes they leave, but they always come right back.

~

We stayed with Angela for a long time. Coaxing her to believe everything would be okay, holding her before she broke into tiny pieces of dirty glass. I feel guilty the moment we get into the car. How do we even know things will be okay? Who are we to tell her she'll be alright? I'm giving her false hope but what else can I do? Although Angela is oblivious to her actions, careless even, she still deserves the truth. Not her, and no one else in the distraught human race, deserves to be lied to.

Even though some impulse inside me says to go back and tell her the truth, I can't. I can't watch her fall apart right in front of me. I could hardly handle it the one time it happened to me. Watching Jade was enough to have my heart aching endlessly.

The rest of the afternoon went by so slowly I thought it may never end. Jade and I watched movie upon movie. Up to the point where we thought our eyes may bleed. In the middle of Sweet Home Alabama, she turns to look at me.

"Brone, can I ask you something?”

"Anything,” I tell her as I reach for her hand, squeezing lightly.

"I saw the way you helped her. How you held her while she cried. Don't lie to me when I ask this. Did you ever love her? And if you did, do you still?"

I don't answer automatically. To be completely honest, I never loved Angela but there's something about her that I may never be able to let go of. There was something inside of her I’ve never found in anyone else. It intrigued me.

"No. She was no good for me. But I'm not so sure that I'll ever fully forget her or be over her. I don't want to ever be with anyone but you, however I still want her in my life. Maybe someday in the future you'll be okay with her and won't want to rip out her throat the moment you see her,” I say jokingly.
She smiles and then nods to me, showing me that she understands. She lays her head on my shoulder and we watch the rest of our eye-bleeding films in silence.

~

                Not long after we finished, Jade went home and I was left to prepare for the horror I call high school. Most of the homework I was assigned I already did in class, but there's nothing wrong in reviewing it all. Sort of want to make it to my graduation.

                I spend roughly half an hour reviewing the components of anatomy and then transferring over to Trigonometry. Why must math be so complex? Is it not possible for me to just get along in life knowing addition, subtraction, and multiplication? I guess not.

                Sundays are supposed to be calm, not all insane with nothing but trouble. I guess that's karma coming back to bite me in the ass.