NOAH

Ch. 21

Chapter 21

Clouds of concern swirl through Noah's usually bright irises as they gaze at our intertwined hands, still holding on to one another. The plastic of his hospital band scrapes the tips of my fingertips as his eyes lift to meet mine.

"Noah, what happened?"

His eyes slump back to our hands. "What always happens. He gets mad, I get hit."

"What do you mean, always?"

"I will always know things he doesn't want me to know. I will always know who my step-mom really is. And, I will always be beaten as long as I live in that house. But, I'll live that everyday if it gets me closer to finding out what he did to my mother."

My heart crashes into the bile of my stomach, cascading it towards my throat as I take in the words he just said. "Beaten? And what did he do to your mom? You think he's responsible?"

His thumb caresses the skin of my hand as a smile slips on his battered lips. "I can handle it. That's another thing I'll always be able to do."

"Please just tell me. Noah, you're life is in danger and if we need to put my mom aside for one second, I will."

His eyes lock onto mine. "Unfortunately, Arcadia Raine, my life is always in danger."

"Well, fortunately, I'm not leaving you on the back-burner anymore. You come first."

"Rai-"

"No," I demand, grabbing Noah's file and flipping it over, "Tell me everything I need to know so I can help."

I imagine my mom would be OK with this. No matter how happy she looked in those photos, she'd never want someone important to me to be hurt. She'd tell me to take my time and make sure Noah is alright before indulging in my own fantasies of finding her. She knows I want Noah by my side during the real thing.

His half cough, half groan, snaps me from my thoughts. "Promise me you won't judge me or look at my brother differently."

I furrow my brows. "Why would I-"

"Promise me."

"I promise, Noah."

"Well, here goes everything." He says, patting the spot beside his legs. "Come up here."

Our hands disconnect as I climb in front of him. "I'm ready."

"Well, yeah, I do believe my dad is responsible for my mom's death. She died when I was nine and one week, one fucking week after she died, my step-mom moves in. Oh, excuse me, I mean my aunt."

"Wait what?"

"My step-mom is my dad's half sister and the mother to my little brother."

My brain swirls this new information around my brain, my hand waving in front of my face. "Wait, wait-"

"My brother's parents are siblings. My step-mom is my aunt."

"So that's why Eli..."

"Yeah. They thought I was so dumb when he was born. My mom was never pregnant, but I automatically have a brother? And with her dying the next year, I know my dad had something to do with it. That's probably why he hates me so much."

"Noah, I don't see you or your brother any different. I like you just the same."

"You like me?" He asks, the heart monitor nearly rising to match my pace as if I was connected to it.

My eyes fall to the white blanket that covers his legs. Lightning bolts strike down from the clouds of trepidation that surround me as Noah asks the question once more. I feel his hand slide into mine as the words I need to say fail to escape the terror that clouds my heart.

"It's OK, Raine. I like you, too."

"I'm scared."

I fear that I will always have this trepidation in my heart, this worry that he'll leave me, that he doesn't like me like I like him. I fear that if I finally do get the courage to be with him, I won't get to. He'll already be swept away by someone better or someone much worse.

"Of what?"

"That you don't like me the way I like you."

He chuckles, causing my eyes to find the sun shining in his. "Arcadia Raine, I'm pretty sure I do."

My heart flutters, though the clouds have dissipated, some still remain. "I'm still scared. What if your dad hurts you to the point that you can-"

"He won't."

"Well, what if-"

"Raine, no pressure, we can go as slow as you need. I'll be your friend for the next hundred years if you want me to." He smiles. "My dad can't keep me from you."

My smile mirrors his. "A hundred years?"

"Yeah, and then after we're old and wrinkly, we can see where this goes."

"Oh, shut up."

He chuckles, clouds looming above his head once more. "I just want to be happy."

"Me too"

"That means you shouldn't worry about me."

"Knowing that when you go home you are being hurt by the man that's supposed to protect you, doesn't worry me at all. It absolutely terrifies me."

"Please, Raine. Cherry and Anderson worry enough as it is. I'm OK, always."

"No one is always OK. And speaking of them, we're probably going to need to let them know what we're doing. This isn't chase the missing mother anymore, it's catch the murderer."

He groans as a laugh attacks his upper body. "Catch the murderer?"

"You know what I mean."

"So you want them to be our eyes in the sky?"

"Or, someone who knows where we are at all times. Just in case the murderer catches us."

He nods, releasing my hand to poke me in the nose. "Cute and smart."

Heat floods through my cheeks, burning through where his finger just tapped me. "Shut up."

"Why would I when you kee-"

Blake and Cherry step into the room, their arguing halting Noah's teasing.

Noah's smile drops. "What's wrong guys?"

"I haven't cleaned the guest room and Blake won't help me."

"Dude, Noah doesn't give a shit about your sheets being a day over washing schedule. Nobody fucking sleeps in there anyway."

"Not the point."

"It's OK, guys. I'm not barred from going home."

My head whips towards him. "There's no way you're going back there."

He shrugs. "Where else can I go?"

Cherry smiles, plucking Blake as he wraps his arms around her from behind. "My house."

"Cherry, I know you want me to come over, but I know you guys have plans and I'm not really down for hearing them tonight."

I watch as the back and forth continues, neither side coming to an agreement. My eyes flutter forward as a yawn stretches out my limbs. I blink away fatigue as images of Noah being knocked backwards, with a force only his father could carry, flood my concentration. Images so sharp against my consciousness, they slice open my lips, spilling out words I never knew I would say.

"You can stay with me."