So Emma's plan of having a night of unfiltered, uninhibited fun came crashing down pretty abruptly when half an hour later Amanda showed up at her apartment already tipsy.
"If I'm gonna go to some Instagram influencer, Youtube party thing then I'm definitely gonna be drunk," she'd slurred upon her arrival, sloppily setting a bottle of vodka down onto Emma's kitchen counter.
Despite the ache still in her chest, Emma couldn't help but let out a laugh.
"Jesus, Amanda. How much have you already had?" she'd asked, gesturing to the glass bottle of Smirnoff in front of her.
"Not enough," Amanda had responded with a grin. "Do you want some? I ubered here and we can always uber there."
Emma debated for a second, biting down on her bottom lip while she studied the almost menacing bottle of clear liquid in front of her. She'd only been drunk a handful of times, but she'd quickly realized that she didn't really love the lack of control and sense it brought.
And tonight she knew it would probably be a recipe for disaster. She could already see herself sobbing into Amanda's shoulder, sloppily pulling out her phone and sending message after message of "i'm sorry" "i love you" "please come back" to the one person she shouldn't be talking to.
No nononnono no. No way was she letting that happen right now. It couldn't happen after what he'd said to her earlier.
"Uhh... that's okay. I can just drive us there and back later. I have a video to film anyway," she'd said after a moment, quickly coming up with the excuse. She could use it to her benefit considering it had been about a week since she last uploaded... not that she was really in the right mindset to film, but.. she knew how to put on a happy face when it mattered most.
She'd been so preoccupied by her own thoughts now trying to come up with a video idea when she'd realized that Amanda was studying her carefully.
"What? Is my makeup fucked up or something?" she'd asked self-consciously, bringing her hand up to wipe at her face a little. "Why are you looking at me like that?"
She could almost see the moment it clicked in Amanda's eyes. Despite the fact that she was well on her way to being drunk, Amanda had always been pretty observant. Something that Emma both loved and also hated at times.
"What's wrong? Did something happen?" Amanda had asked, whatever smile Emma had managed to plaster onto her face quickly sliding off.
"Oh.. what? No. Nothing happened. I'm fine, I just.. don't really want to get drunk tonight," she'd said quickly. "You go ahead, for real. Drink as much as you want and I'll make sure you don't do anything stupid again," she'd laughed, trying to ignore the way it sounded fake even to her own ears.
Amanda was definitely one of Emma's only friends who didn't really give a fuck what other people thought. She did what she wanted, laughed a lot, and was always down to have fun. So when she had dove into the four foot section of the pool after too many drinks at Olivia's on the 4th of July, Emma hadn't been surprised. She'd even laughed along with Amanda about how stupid her busted up face looked the next day.
Despite the fact that her and Amanda did a lot of things differently and weren't really all that similar, they'd found a great friendship in each other. Emma knew that she was someone she could always trust and also have fun with. Sometimes too much fun, but she never really complained. It was nice to have an escape in her crazy, upside down world.
"Shut up, Em, I can always tell when something's wrong with you. Did something happen earlier? With you and Eth—" Amanda had began, though Emma quickly jumped in, not wanting to hear his name right now.
"Amanda, seriously. I'm fine. Just... take a few more shots and let's go, okay? Please," she'd practically pleaded, staring back at Amanda's observant gaze and letting out a breath she didn't realize she had been holding when Amanda finally shrugged.
"Okay, whatever. I'll let it go for now. But, Em.. I really can tell something's bothering you. And I love you, yeah? You know that. So.. when you're ready to tell me, I'm ready to listen."
Emma had been barely holding it together before, but with those words she was well on her way to breaking down again right then.
"God, I hate you. You know that? But I also fucking love you," she'd said, not able to help the tears that were now pooling in her eyes and threatening to pour over.
She'd brought her hands up to fan at her face and let out a watery laugh. "Please just take your shot and shut up," she'd added, glancing over to Amanda with what she hoped was a reassuring smile.
Something else Emma also loved about Amanda was that despite how observant she was and despite how much she cared, she was never one to push or pry.
So with a small smile of her own, Amanda reached down to unscrew the cap off the top of her glass bottle and lifted it up to her lips.
"You don't have to tell me twice!" she'd giggled before taking another long sip of the liquid.
a/n: wow hi!! i woke up to so many new reads and comments on this that i really wasn't expecting so thank u so much to anyone reading and recommending this to people! i sort of posted it randomly after writing chapter one on my phone while bored and didn't expect it to go anywhere tbh. but now i'm super excited to continue it!!!
a few random facts about me for anyone who cares:
-i'm carolyn but i go by carol for short and i just recently turned 22!!! i graduated from college in may with a degree in journalism (but am currently jobless in that area and am instead a nanny rn, hence the need for me to do some sort of writing so i don't go crazy lol)
-i don't have a stan twitter account of my own (just a personal) but i do tend to creep on a lot of emma and ethma fan accounts to keep up to date on any exciting news and stuff (and twitter stans are a whole lot better than instagram ones in my opinion)
-i love love love so many wattpad stories on here (check out my fic recs!) and if i followed u it's probably bc i really love your writing or always see your comments on stories i read also and think ur all pretty cool, funny, and nice <3
-uhhhhhh hm. i'm from the east coast but last month i got to go to LA and i absolutely loved it!!!! could deff see myself moving there and i was also blessed enough to meet the queen miss emma chamberlain herself at a soul cycle class and YES she is just as amazing and perfect and tiny as everyone says she is (she's actually shorter than i thought she was and i was like omg ur so baby in my mind when i first saw her LMAO)
SO THAT'S IT FOR NOW! this was basically just a filler chapter, but things will start to pick up soon! i know all these events are pretty recent so i'm gonna have to come up with some ideas and stuff for future chapters so if anyone has any opinions, thoughts, questions, etc just let me know! thanks so much again for anyone reading :)
