Lost & Found

Chapter 11

Savana and Sierra waited by Lindsay's bedside as they waited for someone to perform a ultrasound. Both worried for her. She just stared at the ceiling silently. 

"Hey," She whispered, "Do you guys think I just lost them?" She asked, the question laced with worry. 

They looked at each other, unsure of what to say. "Nothing's for sure until the ultrasound tech gets here, okay? Think of it just being really heavy implantation blood." Savana smiled, but even she was unsure of what was going on. Sierra's leg bounced with anxiety.

After a while, a woman walked in with a cart full of her ultrasound equipment. "Well, happy holidays to you three. What's the reason we're in need of a ultrasound today?" She smiled, trying to ease tensions in the room. 

"Well, our friend started feeling faint and a bit of pain today, then she stood up and had blood all over the back of her pants." Sierra explained. 

"Hmm, okay, is there a chance she's pregnant?" The woman asked. Savana and Sierra nodded together as Lindsay stayed silent, hoping to hear something good, "Okay, let me plug in, then I'll get right to it." 

She plugged her equipment in as the three girls held hands. Lindsay said a silent prayer for her baby to be safe, although the odds weren't in her favor. 

"This is gonna be cold for just a second, okay, hun?" The tech spoke softly as she squirted the gel onto Lindsay's stomach. "Alrighty, let's see what's up in there." 

All four women looked to the screen, "Alright, so I still have a heartbeat, which is fantastic news. Wanna hear it?" 

Lindsay sighed with a smile, "Yes, please." She closed her eyes as the quick pumping was heard throughout the room. It brought tears to everyone's eyes. The baby was safe. 

"If I were to guess," The tech spoke as she looked around, "I think you lost one of two, unfortunately. I see a small space in here about the same size as this little new person in here, but the one you're hearing sounds strong and ready to grow some more." 

"Wait, wait," Lindsay sat up slightly, "So I-I had twins in here?" 

"Based on what I saw, yes. However, they were dizygotic, meaning they started as two separate eggs fertilized by two separate sperm cells. In which case, they wouldn't have been identical." She smiled, "I'm not sure what to say, though, this is the first case of single twin miscarriage I've ever experienced." 

Lindsay looked at her with wide eyes, "T-Thank you, for my peace of mind." She said sniffling. 

The tech walked out with a nod, closing the door behind her. 

Savana and Sierra looked at Lindsay with smiles. "You're still pregnant! Yay!" Savana brought her arms up and spoke nervously. 

"I think I can tell Niall what happened now." She ran a hand through her hair. "I gotta call him." 

After a lengthy call, Lindsay smiled widely. "I'm so happy." She looked down at her phone, "I got to hear it. Their first little heart beat! Can you believe it?" Her head shot over to Savana and Sierra to see their reactions. 

"It's so exciting! I'm so so happy for you!" Savana smiled wit the same amount of excitement. 

Sierra, while also happy, asked, "Haven't you already been through a 'first heartbeat?'" 

"Well, yeah! But the first one's always so exciting. That significantly lowers the risk of a miscarriage, as well as being a sign of 'oh my gosh, my body formed a heart!' It's so fun to hear!" Savana hugged Lindsay as she stood up. 

Lindsay took a huge sigh of relief, "Okay, lets get back to the house for some more festivities." She already seemed a lot better, but still somewhat off. 

"Is there anything else bothering you while we're here?" Sierra grabbed her shoulder. 

Lindsay shrugged, "I mean, I'm upset that I lost a baby today. Of course, it had  to happen on Christmas of all days, but I'm still pregnant. It's not the worst outcome." 

Sierra and Savana agreed. Lindsay was discharged and given a near-clean bill of health with a reminder that she'd still bleed a little bit for the next few days. 

They got back to the house and everything seemed to have quieted down. Savana looked to Michael in the rocking chair. He held a sleeping Elise, while being nearly asleep himself. 

"It looks like the whole house is asleep." Sierra scoffed with a smile. 

Savana shrugged, "We could clean up a bit. I need to start packing E's gifts into the car." She spoke as she started picking up some toys and walked outside with the keys. 

"Linds, why don't you sit and relax? I'll go find Niall and let him know we're back." Sierra lead her to the couch before rushing up the stairs to find out where Niall went. 

"Hey, little one," Lindsay whispered as to not wake Michael and Elise up, "I know you just lost someone very close to you. I don't know if it was your brother or sister, that's okay though. I just want you to know that I don't blame you and I still love you. Both your mommy and daddy do. We always will, no matter what happens, okay? 

"There's nothing on this earth that can erase you or your other half from my heart. You're still my babies. You hear that, sweetie? You're my babies. I'll tell you the story of us from the moment you're willing to hear. I'll tell you about your sibling that could've been. I'll tell you about how I met your aunties and uncles. I'll tell you about everything you want to hear. I'll make it a story. It'll be your own, handmade fairy tale. 

"It's okay to lose people. I would know. Before you were even a thought, before mommy and daddy met, I lost someone close to me, too. It hurt, but I knew that I'd get through it. I haven't gotten over it. A loss isn't something you get over. It's a pain that dulls over time, but you never forget the ones you loved and lost.

"I heard your heartbeat today, and you have no idea how happy that made me and your aunties. We all cried. I may have lost one, but I still have you. That's all I need, baby. The knowledge that I still have you." She closed her eyes as she gently rubbed her belly. Tears ran down her cheeks, thinking of her uncle that she lost a few years ago. She knew he'd watch over her other baby until she got a chance to meet them. 

She opened her eyes to see Niall hurrying down the stairs with Sierra closely following, "Oh, my God, Lindsay, are you okay? How's the baby?" 

Lindsay looked at him with a soft smile then looked down at her hand, "We're gonna be just fine."