Secrets

Chapter 11 ✧

"Can we all break off into small groups and discuss Psalm 5:3 please," Michael instructs as we all scatter around the room. Megan and I sit with each other in the corner of the room away from most people and I see it in her eyes that she is eager to talk but I have a feeling it's not about Psalm 5:3.

"What?" I question her beginning to feel uncomfortable as she stares at me intensely with a goofy smile on her face.

"You know what! Easton!" she beams a little too loudly and I shush her immediately not wanting anyone to hear. "Sorry! But you have to tell me everything."

"Well we talked things over and he admitted that kissing that girl was wrong and apologised for it. I just couldn't let the possibility of us go on something like that. So I just kissed him," which Megan responses to with a gasp. "I know and it was so good, seriously just the most tummy flipping kiss ever. Then yesterday he took me to this secret place where you can see the most amazing view of the whole town. We just lied down in the grass and talked and you know kissed a little. I just can't believe how good I've got it right now, I keep having to pinch myself to check that it's all real."

"Wow," she says sitting there and staring at me in awe, as if Easton and I are some type of miracle. I guess we are in a way, someone like him and someone like me together. "So did you do anything else besides kiss?" she asks with a smirk.

"No! No way," I say slightly flustered by her insinuation that we did anything more. "W-Why would you say that?"

"Easton just seems very experienced in the girls department which means he's probably use to doing more but that doesn't mean you have to at all! That's good that he isn't pressuring you!"

Megan changes the subject and begins talking about her school and how her 'friends' have the intellectual capacity of a pea and how all the boys there are moronic idiots. She goes on complaining and I try my best to listen and give her my undivided attention considering what a good friend she has been to me. However my mind is in a whole other place, thinking about what Megan said earlier about Easton potentially wanting more, expecting more. Does he expect more from me? I've only known him for a couple months and we've only been together for a few days. Surely he doesn't expect more from me. But like Megan said he's experienced, Easton said it himself, he said he's kissed a lot of girls. There is just something about the way he said it, like his version of kissing entails way more than locking lips. The thing is I don't think I'm ready for more as of yet, in the future maybe, but right now I couldn't, I just don't know him well enough to be that vulnerable with him and take that next step. I'm scared if I don't though that I'll lose him.

"But anyway how is school?" Megan asking snapping me back into reality.

"The last week or so school has been a little hard to balance with Easton and all. I just feel like I haven't been studying as much as usual and I've got tests coming up and I'm scared I've fallen too far behind to keep up my average."

"Let's study on the weekend then! We can go to the library in town because god knows I need to get out of the house," Megan says in excitement.

"That actually sounds perfect! Hopefully I'd be allowed."

Knowing my parents they'd ask why I needed to go into town to study when I could just do it at home. I hate being treated so differently to Theo, he's allowed to do whatever he wants when he wants, its like he's too far gone for my parents to even care. As long as he is there for most of their social events like church and dinner with their friends they're happy.

"Surely they'd let you! Don't your parents think I'm some angel child or something," Megan says with a giggle at her wrong depiction.

"Yeah they do actually," I laugh thinking about all the times my mother has gushes over Megan saying what a nice, responsible, young girl she is.