Raw Winter

Chapter 18: Rotten Peaches

She could feel the straps tight around her. Tight around her wrists, her ankles, her neck, and her chest. She expected them to be tight around her stomach, a round stomach, but there was little stomach left, and no cloth or straps were covering it. It felt as if he had sheared away her shirt, and she could feel her lungs expand and empty with each desperate breath when she was aware she was awake and maybe even a few times before.

She barked out a laugh, not because she was unafraid, but because it was ironic that after all that effort, she was so witlessly terrified now. Even then, she could make obvious distinctions between the chair Dr. Windwell had and the one she was in now. She laughed, imagining Tirenen's secret, dark, grungy lab as a doctor's office now that she knew what a proper one looked like, and imagining herself as his patient.

She had imagined herself alone when she woke up, so when she felt the sharp punch to her jaw—she was expecting a slap, so this was doubly jarring—she could only grunt. She tried to look at him, but her vision was blurring, and she couldn't imagine what he had done to her when she was unconscious.

"You thought you were being very clever, didn't you? I can't imagine whether you thought I was or wasn't aware of where you were going during the day," he said, "but it was quite obvious you were leaving every day or two. I knew where you were going."

She didn't answer. She felt too sick and scared trying to watch him and being unable to. It occurred to her if he actually knew about Dr. Windwell and where she was going, she might be in danger. She almost said so, but clamped her mouth shut. He said, "What is this scar? Where did this come from?"

She couldn't tell if he was bluffing and trying to trick her into saying something she would regret revealing, or if he knew and was mocking her.

She gathered up her courage, preparing herself for whatever was coming before she spoke. "I could have got it from Nevel, or maybe you gave it to me," she said, and Tirenen snarled in her face. Her heart felt like it had stopped, and it felt like she couldn't breathe, but she continued to stare calmly back at him.

He began tearing the straps from her arms and legs. She considered kicking him in the face, but was already too scared of what he was going to do. He had tried to grab the collar he had put around her neck, but Dr. Windwell had since removed it. She hadn't really thought about it since the day he put it on her, so she didn't notice it missing today.

Finding it missing, he wrapped his hand around her neck instead, grabbing onto the fabric of her clothes to hold her still. "Where is it?" He screamed at her. "What did you do with it?"

"Maybe it fell off. I don't know." It was growing harder to keep her voice even. "I didn't notice it gone."

"I'm not talking about that, you stupid bitch. Where is the baby? You were pregnant. I was observing you and knew you were, and now you're not. What did you do with it? Were you given some sort of drug?" Tirenen was growling, and she felt like a viper was poised to strike her face.

"I don't know what you're talking about," she said, more and more panic leaking in. "I wouldn't tell you even if I did."

"You absolute wretch," he spat, tugging her over to his table of tools. He snatched up a scalpel, and it hovered over her eye. "You know what I'm going to do if you don't tell me what I want to know, don't you?"

She shook her head. "If you turn me into a mindless slave, you'll never know what happened to it, Tirenen."

"Then it's still alive somewhere," he said. "You'll tell me, or you're going to find out what I can really do to you. I swear you'll find out. Tell me where it is, and we'll make it all painless, you miserable bitch. I'll even let you choose. I can cut out your heart, or you can drown if you prefer."