Malice

-18

-Nathan-

I stared across my kitchen at Reagan as tears threatened to spill over and processed her confession. Love. I loved her too; but as the mother of my child, not a lover. She had refused to open up her heart to me. A heart that didn't even belong to her but her husband. So I just stood there, what else was there to do? I couldn't lie. I wouldn't. Had we been professing our lust for one another then it would have been different.

I'd tried for weeks now to put a damper on the passion that I held for her. The redhead who had just left my bed being one of many examples. Reagan was even more appealing with evidence of my child inside of her. She was bigger than she had been the last time we had seen one another. Could she feel my daughters kicks? Could I, if I put my hands on her belly and waited?

"You know, it would be really nice if you would say something." Reagan spoke up, nearly choking on the words. And what would I say? Good to know? I sighed heavily and nearly took half my hair off as I raked my hand through it hard. The single tear that slid down her cheek was wiped away quickly. "I'm not staying at home anymore. Not that you care...I just came by to tell you about the baby." My brow twitched at the news. Had he hurt her?

An overwhelming amount of anger went through me at the thought of anyone hurting what was mine. The baby. I didn't want to jump to conclusions, however, so I kept my feelings to myself. "Then where are you staying?"

"A motel."

"A motel?" Which could be just as dangerous if not more than staying with that dickhead husband of hers.

The shrug she gave me was weak. "I haven't been working for weeks now so I can't afford to live in something nicer." All of a sudden she looked exhausted and I clenched my jaws together. Was he being selfish with his money? It certainly was not the way any husband should be with his wife. "I have to go. Tara wants to have lunch so..." I wished our encounter wasn't so awkward but there was nothing I could do to stop it.

Before she could turn to leave, I spoke up. "At least write the address down so that I know where you are." I waved to a notepad and a cup of pens on my island. She didn't argue and went over. As she wrote, I studied her growing belly. A daughter. Just what in the fuck was I supposed to do with a daughter? Especially if she was anything like her mother. Or me for that matter. 

Without thought or permission, when Reagan set the pin back where it went, I walked over to her and took her hand. "Come here." When  I turned her to face me, she looked up at me with surprise. I lifted the bottom of her shirt and leaned down to kiss her smooth, faultless belly that was growing my child.

When I rose back up, a light blush decorated her cheeks. "I can feel her kicking now. Not very strongly but they are there." Reagan said as she pushed her shirt down.

"Can you?" If I had more time, and didn't have to get to work I would have told her to prove it. One day.

"Mhm."

I grabbed the back of Reagan's head and pulled her close, so that I could kiss her forehead. "Be careful, alright?"

"I will." Not one more word was spoken as she turned and left the kitchen. I didn't even move until I heard the front door close behind her. I felt like a complete jackass for not being what she had needed just then. A friend, a lover. Nothing would change the way I felt...not until she was done with that man. I would not share her with anyone.

-Reagan-

"I can't believe he told you to leave. It's baffling. You know, I really wish you would tell me why. Are you sure he didn't hit you again?" I laid in the same shitty bed I had the night before and stared up at the horribly colored ceiling and listened to Tara on the other end of the phone. Outside a thunderstorm was underway.