Minutes seem to lengthen as I wait for Erick beside his car, the vicious shouts from Justin still audible.
"Is she still here?" Justin thunders, shadows creeping to the entrance.
"I told her to stay," Erick answers.
"You're on her side?" Justin accuses, watching his shadow on the ground raise his arm and flex his index finger.
"No," he argues, again stepping closer to the door and away from Justin's shadow. His back appears briefly in my view, before becoming just a shadow again, and seconds later, both disappearing.
Hearing their footsteps fade, I notice they've gone towards the back of the warehouse, away from me and the entrance. Then Justin's roar, "Nick!" floats outside, sending immediate shivers through me, a grave idea approaching me.
Nick.
He warned me not to tell Justin, cautious about his reaction and knowing Justin's reaction will be chilling. His warning about revealing our relationship with him to Justin didn't seem to pass through my mind, due to me being too focused on my son and Erick's threatening.
Nick knew Justin would react terribly, as did everyone else, but Nick also knew Justin would immediately target him, and yet he didn't seem to build borders to keep himself safe. When Erick saw us together, Nick was only in the cafe — alone. Would he be there alone again when Justin has his revenge?
It dawns to me that I need to warn Nick, not just for his own safety, but also for myself. I need to apologise profusely, for not taking his warnings more seriously. Perhaps, if I listened properly, we would've never met in the cafe where Erick fatally saw us. It was risky, yet I felt the need to approach him. If I listened, I would've stole away, to avoid this current mess.
Nick has a right to know that there's a target on him, as Justin had a right to know about Nick and I's relationship. Suddenly, I want to storm back inside and steal Erick away, so we can venture back to the house, where I can reveal this to Nick.
Knowing better, I should stay still, remaining outside until time passes for Erick to leave. Knowing better, I should not be walking to the plagued building. But I also know that I cannot stand outside while Justin strips away my identity and creates me to be a villain.
Their shadows collide with mine. Looking up, I stand by the doors, a hopeful feeling in the pit of my stomach that Justin will calm down and comprehend my thought processes that were racing through me. Instead, his eyes flare with detest as his jaw locks. Erick, beside him, says, "Selena, it's best if you wait outside."
Refusing to listen, I start, "Justin, will you listen to me? It meant nothing at all. Nick was lovely, but he isn't you. I always wanted you. I was despondent and confused, desperate for you. He happened to be there, and so a horrible mistake started. That's all."
Erick strides to me, placing his hand on my arm and tugging me gently to the exit, informing me to leave, but I ignore him. "You're comparing me to him?" Justin wonders, drawing dangerously close. Erick keeps his arm on my arm, no longer to drag me away, but instead to protect me as he stands between Justin and I.
"No, not you as a person, but everything you stood for. Nick is a workaholic, just as you. You're both in the same career and have the same thoughts. He's going to remind me of you. That's what I desired, when I needed you the most; a reminder of you that meant I haven't been imagining you this whole time."
Scoffing, he says, "That's what you needed the most, a reminder of me? How about me, Selena? Everyday I sat staring at a wall, you on my mind constantly. To think that while I was being tortured of need and memories, you was having sex with someone who actively loathes me."
"You wouldn't do the same, Justin? Really? If you had the choice, you would find a random girl and please yourself," I argue.
"I didn't say you couldn't jump on the next person you saw, but doing it with Nick is not the same, Selena. Do you not see what is wrong with you?"
"Of course, I do! It's been torturing me for how pathetic I was, but I can't change the past. At least I'm showing guilt, Justin. I wouldn't be standing here right now otherwise," I retort. His fiery eyes that scream hate seem to calm for a minute, before he quickly recovers and hides behind his mask.
"Good for you," he remarks. "But guilt isn't going to change that you once thought it was seemingly fine for you to even speak to someone who, at one point in my life, always reminded me that I was a pathetic boy and wasn't good for anyone. My father wasn't there for me, but Nick was the big, bad wolf in my story. I didn't need an evil father, he came close to that role for me."
Erick's tight grasp on my arm loosens as he listens to this story, staring at Justin whose eyes remain on me. Fire roars in his eyes, but for a moment, there's a rush of water that stops the flames.
"Justin," I begin, but lose the words to speak.
Clearing his throat, he says, "Don't you dare say it isn't anything again, because nothing removes the feeling that rips my gut apart, knowing that the person who always determines himself to be better than my worth also got the one person that reminded me that I am alive and worthy. I thought I was finally loved, something that used to be unattainable for someone like me. I was proud to say that I found someone to share a love that lights everything that was deemed lost darkness. But, perhaps, I was wrong. Because if Nick can also achieve this, then what was I thinking?"
"Justin," I repeat, my throat burning and itching to scream all the right words. But there isn't any. I was degrading his feelings, for my own benefit; deeming that the relationship wasn't important, just to protect myself, but it is to him. Maybe it's me that doesn't deserve a burning love so raw and rare, and it's me that's unworthy of it.
"Can you ever forgive me?" I ask finally, my lips quivering and wanting his. But the seething resentment that danced in his eyes were locked away, nothing but just his honey eyes now. All the emotions that surged from him moments ago were pushed away, becoming nothing but just his skeleton. His furrowed eyebrows now rest, the vein in his forehead gone. He remains staring nonchalantly, as if the moment isn't heavy and determining the future.
"I can't be with you right now," he answers, stepping away and removing the last strip of closeness left. Erick steps beside me, confident that Justin won't come near again and revealing myself properly, with my heart on show and tears swimming in my eyes. He watches, seeing my eyes become red and my heart shattering.
But he just continues staring.
YOU ARE READING
His Crime
Fanfiction[Sequel to 'His Girl'] After a year of Justin Bieber being sentenced for his crimes, he marks his big entrance home and reclaims his earned title. However, he will soon realise that his haunting thoughts come true, and he's the reason for it.
