His Crime

Chapter Twenty-One

"Let's talk about this," Erick proposes, stepping closer to Justin. But Justin moves back, from shimmering hope of him being able to accept Erick's apology and comprehend his thought process.

"You want to talk about this? Then why didn't you the night I got arrested? While I was rotting away behind bars, I kept imagining the worst of things, how I deserved it all and how I wronged people in my life. What I did to Nick, what I did to you, what I did to Selena," Justin reveals, not daring to look at me. "To think you knew the reasoning all along, playing along to my theories I created and to being the messenger. You didn't stop me. I was driving myself insane, and you didn't stop me. By telling the truth, you could've stopped it all. Why didn't you?"

Erick remains mute, staring speechlessly at Justin, trying to form words and losing it. "I wanted to," he starts, licking his lips as he tastes the story brewing, wanting to make sure the next words he chooses defines him correctly. "You kept telling me it was your fault, how I didn't do anything wrong, that is was your mistake so you have to deal with the consequences. It didn't sit right with me, I wanted to know the truth for why everyone went against you suddenly, so I spoke to Alissa.

She said it all connected back to you and your watch, with your DNA wrapped around it. They had no other leads, it was all they had. I told her you didn't set foot into that area anywhere near that fatal night, but all she had to say was that maybe you've been set up. Perhaps not seriously, but it was enough for me to hunt for a real answer. I went to the one person known to have a bad relationship with you: Nick. It wasn't long before he was boasting about his doing."

Justin turns away, tugging his hair before facing Erick again in defeat. "You want to defend him. After this?"

"I am not defending him, because what he did was right, but for the fact you needed this time away. You were going crazy, Justin. What Nick did was terribly wrong, but also a blessing in disguise. You wanted to stop everything, working with people who literally gave a blind eye to your crimes, wanting to stop hanging out with everyone back at the warehouse. I'm not defending Nick, but he agreed to let you know, to expose himself. A man with no guilt wouldn't do that."

Leo steps closer to us standing by the entrance of the building and away from the car, astound to hear Erick's story. Justin steps away, raising his eyebrows in shock. "You wanted me to go to prison for changing? For shifting my priorities? This," he waves his arms around, "isn't permanent. We both knew that, from the very beginning. Did you imagine us to be fifty and running around like we do now? I fell in love, Erick. I wanted to grow up from my rage and tantrums. I wanted to finally learn from my mistakes instead of fighting against it. I didn't want this life anymore, but it was ripped away from me without any warning. And you let it happen, because you wanted everything to stay the same."

Justin's eyes wonder to me briefly before he glares back to Erick, who rubs his face. "This is all I have," he mutters, removing his hands. "There's nothing else for me. All my life has been this, since I met you. I didn't know what else to do, Justin," he explains hopelessly. "But I was going to tell you. I was going to do it today, with Nick by my side to make things more easier. I didn't mean for this to go the way it has, or for this long."

"But it did, Erick. You didn't mean for it to, but it did. You could've told me any given moment, don't use now as an excuse." Again, Justin moves back, further from where Erick and I stand, closer to Leo and the car.

"Let's speak about this, Justin," Erick pleads, shortening the gap Justin's creating.

"There isn't anything to speak about," he hisses. Scoffing, he adds, "To think that you would never have told me if I hadn't taken it upon myself." He steps away, breathing in the view of Erick and his broken mask, before turning and striding to the car, marking his exit.

"Justin," I call, moving past Erick and closer to him, wanting to grab his arm and shout everything I can't.

He looks to me, finally seeing me, and sighs. "I didn't want any of this, Selena. To fall in love or need someone, but then you appeared and I started wanting everything. Our son is in the backseat, in a car where we can drive anywhere to, but you have to decide now what that means."

"What do you want it to mean?" I ask. "You said you can't leave, that no matter where you go you'll always be looking over your shoulder."

"I did," he agrees. "But I think that life is worth it when it is spent with you two. I've said you deserve better, but I will make myself better to deserve you."

I want to decide a peaceful life with Justin, to choose a destination to drive to and hide in, to watch our son grow together, for Justin to be on the other side congratulating our son for his first steps. To live in a house we can shelter in and adore, but big enough to let our son's imagination run around. But my mind reminds me of the other side of this world, the places we can't go or take our son to, never experiencing the simplicity of walking around our new neighbourhood without fear of anyone spotting Justin. Of our son never being able to say Justin Bieber is my father without being shunned.

While he stares at me, examining my thoughts, Justin's eyes only tell me one thing: there's nothing more he wants than this. He's pleading with me, begging for me to stay with him, to let him stay with his son, to let him learn what it means to be a father.

To let him learn what it means to live a normal life.

All his life, he's joined the wrong crowd and reigned the wrong places. He's been taught to behave sinisterly, to act defensively, to not let anyone in or let them glance behind his mask. But he's grown from the bitter person I met him as, to someone who beautifully cares about people and is no long afraid to reveal what he feels.

Standing before me, is a changed person who's willing to change some more. He has a second chance at life, to change his identity and start anew, with no need for his old ways anymore.

Watching his hazel eyes, I smile. He finds out everything he needs to, as he grabs my hand and leads me to the car, a new sense of belonging forming between us. We may have had a terrible start and middle, but we're going to make sure the end is how we want it to be.

In love and with our son.