How To Love ✓

42.

Amara

The car ride was unusually silent as neither of us knew what to say or who should have spoken first. I studied the passing cars outside and played with the knitted gloves that provided warmth to my hands.

I had often wondered if reality and fantasy were similar.

These past few months proposed quite differently.

I came to recognise that it was preferable to live a life devoid of irrational expectations and to embrace the fact that life was flawed, frequently predictable, and replete with sorrow and despair. Even when there were situations beyond our control, reality has always been preferable since it represented the truth.

And that was what we got wrong, when we avoided the truth. However, there were instances when living with reality was preferable to living in fantasy.

We made reality seem as if it was something that is bad, or frightening. But, if you look on the bright side, you would have realised that it was beautiful.

The past Amara would have thought it was too impossible to have change in her life, but the present Amara definitely proved her wrong. I found that power, not only through myself, but through another.

Lucien and I both had our strengths, our weaknesses, our quirks and our flaws. Put them all together and they cause a friction.

But it was our differences that bonded us together.

Through mid-daydream, I felt a heavy object on my leg. I looked down and saw that Lucien placed a hand there. When I met his gaze, it was as though his eyes were filled with so much mixed emotions. But I didn't tell him to move his hand nor did I move it. I left it there, my skin tingling under the thick pants that hugged my leg.

We both knew I craved his touch. I missed him, more than anything in the world. I was just too naive right now to confess.

We drove around for an hour before reaching our destination. The place our first date took place at.

My favourite place to be.

The Golden State Park.

After killing the engine, Lucien tucked the keys into his coat pocket. He stopped me as I reached for the door handle to get out, which caused me to give him a suspicious look.

"Let me get it for you," he offered. He remained the epitome of a gentleman, no matter how high or low we got along. You may refer to it as "the bare minimum," but little things and the mannerisms consistently got to me.

I thanked him quietly as he helped me out of the car gently. We walked side by side into the chilly atmosphere, neither of us speaking, just already being entertained by each other's presence. He absentmindedly interlocked our hands together, bringing them up to his lips to place a soft, yet subtle kiss to my clothed hand. I swooned at the action and blushed a little. I found myself staring up at him as we casually walked down the bridge to our favourite spot.

"Why are you so keen of me Ms. Belle?" he acquired, pursing his lips.

"I am so keen on you Mr. King, for the fact that I am heavily inspired by you. I admire you and I deeply care for you. A life without you would always have a blank space and you just... fill my life with colours that I never knew existed," I answered truthfully.

He chuckled. "You always were too good for me."

"Where is all this coming from?" I pondered, moving a strand of hair away from my face and tucked it behind my ear.

He pulled us off the path and over to our normal location on the lawn. We seemed to have marked it in some way. Observing my trembling, he proposed that we sat closely together so that he could have kept me warm. He put his arms around me and tucked me into him as I positioned the oxygen tank just next to us. I heard him exhale at the contact of our bodies.