This story is one of my personal favorites here on Wattpad. I might even end up reading it all. (If my cruel school let me be free from homework for a few days or so) Even then, I would rather read this than study. I mean, this book is worth the trouble.
THE BAD
1: Minor mistakes, but I already pointed them out in the comments section of your book.
2: Characters. I love the mysterious girl, but the main character, aka the most important part, isn't someone you did like. I know it's just the first 2 chapters, but people judge the book by the start. The character was a bit hot-headed, and personally I wouldn't talk to him in real life. (I would love to talk to the girl, though) Try to add more personality to them.
3: Detail. I know you already got this from some readers, but it's true AND important. Your book needs just a little, just a little bit of detail. Too much might make it boring - just a little to spice things up. (It also helps with the characters) Also, it feels like you are telling, not showing (not always, though.) So detail might help.
4: Cover. The cover is good, but not very eye-catching. People judge books by their covers, after all. (just a suggestion, but a girl with red hair on the cover? no? okay.)
THE GOOD
Don't hate me for the things above. I will try to make up for it. I promise.
1: Fast-pacing. One of your readers said it was too fast - but for me personally, on digital books, fast-pacing and short chapters is something I - and many, many others - carve for. Good job here.
2: LOVED the mystery. I just couldn't stop reading. (even though there was a pile of homework and anxiety right by my side) Keep the mystery going.
3: Reactions. Your characters react properly to situations, as if they were real. Orryn needs personality, but he still knows how to act real. (lol.) It's as if it actually happened to YOU. (did it?)
4: LOVED. THE. SELECTION. OF. WORDS. like, literally. They weren't fancy over-the-top kind, (thank god.) but they weren't the same old easy words we learned in pre-school. They were perfect.
5: Overall quite Mysterious, Gripping, Fast-pacing, and the ultimate un-put-downable thing of 2019.
READ THIS BOOK RIGHT NOW. I PROMISE YOU WON'T REGRET IT.
Marks: calculating........
Cover: -.5
Detail: -.5
Characters: -.5
Total: 8.5 out of 10.
Great work! Keep Writing!
p.s: Send me this book if you ever publish it.
YOU ARE READING
Story Critic | Closed For Now
RandomHey guys! The title says it all. I can read your books for you and point out the goods and bads. Don't give up, keep writing!
