Big Book of Ancient Gabanian Fables

Book LXXI: Biggolow Jiggalow

A certain father had two sons, the elder of whom was smart andsensible, and could do everything, but the younger was stupid andcould neither learn nor understand anything, and when people saw himthey said 'there's a fellow who will give his father some trouble.'When anything had to be done, it was always the elder who was forcedto do it, but if his father bade him fetch anything when it was late,or in the night-time, and the way led through the churchyard, or anyother dismal place, he answered 'oh, no, father, I'll not go there,it makes me shudder.' For he was afraid. Or when stories were toldby the fire at night which made the flesh creep, the listenerssometimes said 'oh, it makes us shudder.' The younger sat in a cornerand listened with the rest of them, and could not imagine what theycould mean. 'They are always saying 'it makes me shudder, it makesme shudder, it does not make me shudder.' Thought he. 'That, too,must be an art of which I understand nothing.'Now it came to pass that his father said to him one day 'hearken tome, you fellow in the corner there, you are growing tall and strong,and you too must learn something by which you can earn your bread.Look how your brother works, but you do not even earn your salt.''Well, father, he replied, 'I am quite willing to learn something -indeed, if it could but be managed, I should like to learn how toshudder. I don't understand that at all yet.' The elder brothersmiled when he heard that, and thought to himself 'good God, what ablockhead that brother of mine is. He will never be good foranything as long as he lives. He who wants to be a sickle must bendhimself betimes.' The father sighed, and answered him 'you shall soonlearn what it is to shudder, but you will not earn your bread bythat.' Soon after this the sexton came to the house on a visit, andthe father bewailed his trouble, and told him how his younger son wasso backward in every respect that he knew nothing and learnt nothing.'Just think, said he, 'when I asked him how he was going to earnhis bread, he actually wanted to learn to shudder.' 'If that be all,replied the sexton, 'he can learn that with me. Send him to me, andI will soon polish him.' The father was glad to do it, for he thought'it will train the boy a little.' The sexton therefore took him intohis house, and he had to ring the church bell. After a day or two,the sexton awoke him at midnight, and bade him arise and go up intothe church tower and ring the bell. 'You shall soon learn whatshuddering is, thought he, and secretly went there before him, andwhen the boy was at the top of the tower and turned round, and wasjust going to take hold of the bell rope, he saw a white figurestanding on the stairs opposite the sounding hole. 'Who is there.'Cried he, but the figure made no reply, and did not move or stir.'Give an answer, cried the boy, 'or take yourself off, you have nobusiness here at night.'The sexton, however, remained standing motionless that the boy mightthink he was a ghost. The boy cried a second time 'what do you wanthere. - Speak if you are an honest fellow, or I will throw you downthe steps.' The sexton thought 'he can't mean to be as bad as hiswords, uttered no sound and stood as if he were made of stone. Thenthe boy called to him for the third time, and as that was also to nopurpose, he ran against him and pushed the ghost down the stairs, sothat it fell down ten steps and remained lying there in a corner.Thereupon he rang the bell, went home, and without saying a word wentto bed, and fell asleep. The sexton's wife waited a long time forher husband, but he did not come back. At length she became uneasy,and wakened the boy, and asked 'do you not know where my husband is.He climbed up the tower before you did.' 'No, I don't know, repliedthe boy, 'but someone was standing by the sounding hole on the otherside of the steps, and as he would neither give an answer nor goaway, I took him for a scoundrel, and threw him downstairs. Just gothere and you will see if it was he. I should be sorry if it were.'The woman ran away and found her husband, who was lying moaning inthe corner, and had broken his leg.She carried him down, and then with loud screams she hastened to theboy's father. 'Your boy, cried she, 'has been the cause of a greatmisfortune. He has thrown my husband down the steps so that he brokehis leg. Take the good-for-nothing fellow out of our house.' Thefather was terrified, and ran thither and scolded the boy. 'Whatwicked tricks are these.' Said he, 'the devil must have put theminto your head.' 'Father, he replied, 'do listen to me. I am quiteinnocent. He was standing there by night like one intent on doingevil. I did not know who it was, and I entreated him three timeseither to speak or to go away.' 'Ah, said the father, 'I havenothing but unhappiness with you. Go out of my sight. I will seeyou no more.''Yes, father, right willingly, wait only until it is day. Then willI go forth and learn how to shudder, and then I shall, at any rate,understand one art which will support me.' 'Learn what you will,spoke the father, 'it is all the same to me. Here are fifty talersfor you. Take these and go into the wide world, and tell no one fromwhence you come, and who is your father, for I have reason to beashamed of you.' 'Yes, father, it shall be as you will. If youdesire nothing more than that, I can easily keep it in mind.'When day dawned, therefore, the boy put his fifty talers into hispocket, and went forth on the great highway, and continually said tohimself 'if I could but shudder. If I could but shudder.' Then a manapproached who heard this conversation which the youth was holdingwith himself, and when they had walked a little farther to where theycould see the gallows, the man said to him 'look, there is the treewhere seven men have married the ropemaker's daughter, and are nowlearning how to fly. Sit down beneath it, and wait till night comes,and you will soon learn how to shudder.' 'If that is all that iswanted, answered the youth, 'it is easily done, but if I learn howto shudder as fast as that, you shall have my fifty talers. Justcome back to me early in the morning.' Then the youth went to thegallows, sat down beneath it, and waited till evening came. And as hewas cold, he lighted himself a fire, but at midnight the wind blew sosharply that in spite of his fire, he could not get warm. And as thewind knocked the hanged men against each other, and they movedbackwards and forwards, he thought to himself 'if you shiver below bythe fire, how those up above must freeze and suffer.' And as he feltpity for them, he raised the ladder, and climbed up, unbound one ofthem after the other, and brought down all seven. Then he stoked thefire, blew it, and set them all round it to warm themselves. Butthey sat there and did not stir, and the fire caught their clothes.So he said 'take care, or I will hang you up again.' The dead men,however, did not hear, but were quite silent, and let their rags goon burning. At this he grew angry, and said 'if you will not takecare, I cannot help you, I will not be burnt with you, and he hungthem up again each in his turn. Then he sat down by his fire and fellasleep, and the next morning the man came to him and wanted to havethe fifty talers, and said 'well, do you know how to shudder.' 'No,answered he, 'how should I know. Those fellows up there did notopen their mouths, and were so stupid that they let the few old ragswhich they had on their bodies get burnt.' Then the man saw that hewould not get the fifty talers that day, and went away saying 'such ayouth has never come my way before.' The youth likewise went his way,and once more began to mutter to himself 'ah, if I could but shudder.Ah, if I could but shudder.' A waggoner who was striding behind himheard this and asked 'who are you.' 'I don't know, answered theyouth. Then the waggoner asked 'from whence do you come.' 'I knownot.' 'Who is your father.' 'That I may not tell you.' 'What is itthat you are always muttering between your teeth.' 'Ah, replied theyouth, 'I do so wish I could shudder, but no one can teach me how.''Enough of your foolish chatter, said the waggoner. 'Come, go withme, I will see about a place for you.' The youth went with thewaggoner, and in the evening they arrived at an inn where they wishedto pass the night. Then at the entrance of the parlor the youthagain said quite loudly 'if I could but shudder. If I could butshudder.' The host who heard this, laughed and said 'if that is yourdesire, there ought to be a good opportunity for you here.' 'Ah, besilent, said the hostess, 'so many prying persons have already losttheir lives, it would be a pity and a shame if such beautiful eyes asthese should never see the daylight again.' But the youth said'however difficult it may be, I will learn it. For this purposeindeed have I journeyed forth.' He let the host have no rest, untilthe latter told him, that not far from thence stood a haunted castlewhere any one could very easily learn what shuddering was, if hewould but watch in it for three nights. The king had promised thathe who would venture should have his daughter to wife, and she wasthe most beautiful maiden the sun shone on. Likewise in the castlelay great treasures, which were guarded by evil spirits, and thesetreasures would then be freed, and would make a poor man rich enough.Already many men had gone into the castle, but as yet none had comeout again. Then the youth went next morning to the king and said 'ifit be allowed, I will willingly watch three nights in the hauntedcastle.' The king looked at him, and as the youth pleased him, hesaid 'you may ask for three things to take into the castle with you,but they must be things without life.' Then he answered 'then I askfor a fire, a turning lathe, and a cutting-board with the knife.' Theking had these things carried into the castle for him during the day.When night was drawing near, the youth went up and made himself abright fire in one of the rooms, placed the cutting-board and knifebeside it, and seated himself by the turning-lathe. 'Ah, if I couldbut shudder.' Said he, 'but I shall not learn it here either.'Towards midnight he was about to poke his fire, and as he was blowingit, something cried suddenly from one corner 'au, miau. How cold weare.' 'You fools.' Cried he, 'what are you crying about. If you arecold, come and take a seat by the fire and warm yourselves.' And whenhe had said that, two great black cats came with one tremendous leapand sat down on each side of him, and looked savagely at him withtheir fiery eyes. After a short time, when they had warmedthemselves, they said 'comrade, shall we have a game of cards.' 'Whynot.' He replied, 'but just show me your paws.' Then they stretchedout their claws. 'Oh, said he, 'what long nails you have. Wait, Imust first cut them for you.' Thereupon he seized them by thethroats, put them on the cutting-board and screwed their feet fast.'I have looked at your fingers, said he, 'and my fancy forcard-playing has gone, and he struck them dead and threw them outinto the water. But when he had made away with these two, and wasabout to sit down again by his fire, out from every hole and cornercame black cats and black dogs with red-hot chains, and more and moreof them came until he could no longer move, and they yelled horribly,and got on his fire, pulled it to pieces, and tried to put it out.He watched them for a while quietly, but at last when they were goingtoo far, he seized his cutting-knife, and cried 'away with you,vermin, and began to cut them down. Some of them ran away, the othershe killed, and threw out into the fish-pond. When he came back hefanned the embers of his fire again and warmed himself. And as hethus sat, his eyes would keep open no longer, and he felt a desire tosleep. Then he looked round and saw a great bed in the corner.'That is the very thing for me, said he, and got into it. When hewas just going to shut his eyes, however, the bed began to move ofits own accord, and went over the whole of the castle. 'That's right,said he, 'but go faster.' Then the bed rolled on as if six horseswere harnessed to it, up and down, over thresholds and stairs, butsuddenly hop, hop, it turned over upside down, and lay on him like amountain. But he threw quilts and pillows up in the air, got out andsaid 'now any one who likes, may drive, and lay down by his fire, andslept till it was day. In the morning the king came, and when he sawhim lying there on the ground, he thought the evil spirits had killedhim and he was dead. Then said he 'after all it is a pity, -- for sohandsome a man.' The youth heard it, got up, and said 'it has notcome to that yet.' Then the king was astonished, but very glad, andasked how he had fared. 'Very well indeed, answered he, 'one nightis past, the two others will pass likewise.' Then he went to theinnkeeper, who opened his eyes very wide, and said 'I never expectedto see you alive again. Have you learnt how to shudder yet.' 'No,said he, 'it is all in vain. If some one would but tell me.' Thesecond night he again went up into the old castle, sat down by thefire, and once more began his old song 'if I could but shudder.' Whenmidnight came, an uproar and noise of tumbling about was heard, atfirst it was low, but it grew louder and louder. Then it was quietfor a while, and at length with a loud scream, half a man came downthe chimney and fell before him. 'Hullo.' Cried he, 'another halfbelongs to this. This is not enough.' Then the uproar began again,there was a roaring and howling, and the other half fell downlikewise. 'Wait, said he, 'I will just stoke up the fire a littlefor you.' When he had done that and looked round again, the twopieces were joined together, and a hideous man was sitting in hisplace. 'That is no part of our bargain, said the youth, 'the benchis mine.' The man wanted to push him away, the youth, however, wouldnot allow that, but thrust him off with all his strength, and seatedhimself again in his own place. Then still more men fell down, oneafter the other, they brought nine dead men's legs and two skulls,and set them up and played at nine-pins with them. The youth alsowanted to play and said 'listen you, can I join you.' 'Yes, if youhave any money.' Money enough, replied he, 'but your balls are notquite round.' Then he took the skulls and put them in the lathe andturned them till they were round. 'There, now they will rollbetter.' Said he. 'Hurrah. Now we'll have fun.' He played with themand lost some of his money, but when it struck twelve, everythingvanished from his sight. He lay down and quietly fell asleep. Nextmorning the king came to inquire after him. 'How has it fared withyou this time.' Asked he. 'I have been playing at nine-pins, heanswered, 'and have lost a couple of farthings.' 'Have you notshuddered then.' 'What.' Said he, 'I have had a wonderful time. IfI did but know what it was to shudder.' The third night he sat downagain on his bench and said quite sadly 'if I could but shudder.'When it grew late, six tall men came in and brought a coffin. Thensaid he 'ha, ha, that is certainly my little cousin, who died only afew days ago, and he beckoned with his finger, and cried 'come,little cousin, come.' They placed the coffin on the ground, but hewent to it and took the lid off, and a dead man lay therein. He felthis face, but it was cold as ice. 'Wait, said he, 'I will warm youa little, and went to the fire and warmed his hand and laid it on thedead man's face, but he remained cold. Then he took him out, and satdown by the fire and laid him on his breast and rubbed his arms thatthe blood might circulate again. As this also did no good, hethought to himself 'when two people lie in bed together, they warmeach other, and carried him to the bed, covered him over and lay downby him. After a short time the dead man became warm too, and beganto move. Then said the youth, 'see, little cousin, have I not warmedyou.' The dead man, however, got up and cried 'now will I strangleyou.' 'What.' Said he, 'is that the way you thank me. You shall atonce go into your coffin again, and he took him up, threw him intoit, and shut the lid. Then came the six men and carried him awayagain. 'I cannot manage to shudder, said he. 'I shall never learnit here as long as I live.' Then a man entered who was taller thanall others, and looked terrible. He was old, however, and had a longwhite beard. 'You wretch, cried he, 'you shall soon learn what itis to shudder, for you shall die.' 'Not so fast, replied the youth.'If I am to die, I shall have to have a say in it.' 'I will soonseize you, said the fiend. 'Softly, softly, do not talk so big. Iam as strong as you are, and perhaps even stronger.' 'We shall see,said the old man. 'If you are stronger, I will let you go - come, wewill try.' Then he led him by dark passages to a smith's forge, tookan axe, and with one blow struck an anvil into the ground. 'I can dobetter than that, said the youth, and went to the other anvil. Theold man placed himself near and wanted to look on, and his whitebeard hung down. Then the youth seized the axe, split the anvil withone blow, and in it caught the old man's beard. 'Now I have you,said the youth. 'Now it is your turn to die.' Then he seized an ironbar and beat the old man till he moaned and entreated him to stop,when he would give him great riches. The youth drew out the axe andlet him go. The old man led him back into the castle, and in acellar showed him three chests full of gold. 'Of these, said he,'one part is for the poor, the other for the king, the third yours.'In the meantime it struck twelve, and the spirit disappeared, so thatthe youth stood in darkness. 'I shall still be able to find my wayout, said he and felt about, found the way into the room, and sleptthere by his fire. Next morning the king came and said 'now you musthave learnt what shuddering is.' 'No, he answered 'what can it be.My dead cousin was here, and a bearded man came and showed me a greatdeal of money down below, but no one told me what it was to shudder.''Then, said the king, 'you have saved the castle, and shall marry mydaughter.' 'That is all very well, said he, 'but still I do not knowwhat it is to shudder.' Then the gold was brought up and the weddingcelebrated, but howsoever much the young king loved his wife, andhowever happy he was, he still said always 'if I could but shudder -if I could but shudder.' And this at last angered her. Herwaiting-maid said 'I will find a cure for him, he shall soon learnwhat it is to shudder. She went out to the stream which flowedthrough the garden, and had a whole bucketful of gudgeons brought toher.At night when the young king was sleeping, his wife was to draw theclothes off him and empty the bucketful of cold water with thegudgeons in it over him, so that the little fishes would sprawl abouthim. Then he woke up and cried 'oh, what makes me shudder so. - Whatmakes me shudder so, dear wife. Ah. Now I know what it is toshudder.'