MY BEST FRIEND IS A SECRET AGENT, Book 2: How C.H.I.P. Took a Dive to Dash...

Chapter 20: "Ambushed"

Chip and I eventually made it home safely, but we didn't have any time to relax.

Dr. Eelstrom was filling up Lake Vortville with ocean water, and if we didn't stop him fast, he might destroy the dam and flood the city! Vortville could become the next Atlantis in a matter of hours.

But I was also really worried about the C.H.I.P. microthingy on Chip's tooth. It had shorted out on the lake, and I managed to get it working again back at HQ, but I feared it might short out a second time with another shock. I wondered if we should take that chance . . . because I did have another option:

The new C.H.I.P. microthingy 2.0! That's right, the next evolution in C.H.I.P. technology!

But the C.H.I.P. 2.0 wasn't exactly ready yet. I hadn't even tested it! What if I attached it to Chip's tooth, and it didn't work?

Or what if it did work but it also did new stuff I never programmed it to do? Sure, it might be cool new stuff, but it could be weird new stuff too, like turning Chip into a potted plant or something.

In the end, I decided to keep the C.H.I.P. 2.0 locked up for now. We were in the middle of a citywide crisis, and things were too serious for us to take any unnecessary chances.

Instead, the first thing we had to do was warn the people of Vortville about Dr. Eelstrom and his evil plan. And the best way to do that was to call Mayor Mooney and have him spread the word fast.

But when I called City Hall in the morning, they said the Mayor was at Lake Vortville. I thought, hey, maybe he was already warning people!

Or not. Stella turned on the TV, and there was Mayor Mooney at the lake being interviewed by Anastasia O'Neil. "Our water problems are over, folks!" he said, beaming. "Lake Vortville is filling up again, so we can forget all that water conservation stuff! WA-HOO!" Then he took off waterskiing across the lake.

Chip got all excited. "I want to go waterskiing too!"

I told him he went waterskiing just last week, when he caught Pinkie.

Chip remembered. "Oh, yeah. That was cool! Make me a champion water-skier again, Nort, pleeeeease!"

I told him we had to save Vortville from Dr. Eelstrom first.

Chip said, "Okay. But definitely after that, right?"

I said sure.

Chip cheered, "WA-HOO!"

Suddenly, I got this idea that Chip was going to be the mayor of Vortville one day. Don't ask me why.

Anyway, I wasn't cheering at the idea of waterskiing on a rising Lake Vortville; I was even more worried than before. Not only was Vortville in danger, the mayor didn't even realize it, and he was encouraging people just to kick back and have fun.

Now it was even more urgent for C.H.I.P. to stop Dr. Eelstrom, and fast!

Just then, I heard my dad talking to my mom upstairs: "I'll be back in a few hours, dear. Don't wait up."

I realized what was going on. He was heading out with his team to stop Dr. Eelstrom! But, of course, he was going to do it his way. And that was not a good thing—for half of Vortville, anyway.

I bolted upstairs and found Dad ready to head out the door. He was fully suited up in scuba gear, complete with fins and a diving tank.

Yeah, he looked really goofy in our living room.

"It's Dr. Eelstrom again," Dad told Mom. "Gotta go blow up his evil lair. Wish me luck!"

"Wait!" I said. "Isn't his evil lair at the bottom of Lake Vortville?"

"I don't know where you get your information, Nort, but that's classified. And yes."

"But if you blow up Dr. Eelstrom's evil lair at the bottom of the lake, won't that blow up Vortville Dam too?!"

"My demolitions expert puts the odds at 50/50," Dad said matter-of-factly.

"50/50?!" I cried. There was a 50 percent chance that 100 percent of Vortville would soon be underwater. Those weren't very good odds, even for Dad.

"Collateral damage, son," he said. "There's no avoiding it."

And this is why I invented the C.H.I.P. in the first place.

Dad opened the door and flop-flop-flopped out to the car in his scuba fins. And even though he was moving at a snail's pace, I knew I couldn't stop him.

Suddenly, Anastasia O'Neil jumped out of the bushes and ambushed Dad with her camera crew.

"Where are you going, Colonel McKrakken?" Anastasia demanded. "Are you going to take on another wacky bad guy? Which half of Vortville do you expect to destroy this time? Or do you expect to get trapped and have the hero guy come to save you and the city of Vortville once again?"

"No comment. Yes. I don't know. And over my dead body. You can quote me on that," he said as he got into his car and sped away.

"And there you have it," Anastasia said to the camera, "Colonel Brock McKrakken of McKrakken Security Systems is off to save—and partially destroy—Vortville once again."

Not if I can help it, I thought to myself. I turned to head back inside—but then Anastasia stopped me. "Are you Colonel McKrakken's son?" she asked.

I stared blankly at the glaring lights. "Uh, yeah," I said. Okay, cut me some slack; it was my first time on camera.

"You're Nort McKrakken?" she inquired, leaning in.

"Yeah." See, I skipped the "uh" this time. I was clearly getting more comfortable with being on TV.

"The Nort McKrakken who goes to Vortville Middle School and won First Prize in the science fair?"

"Six out of the last seven science fairs, actually," I said, fixing my hair and standing up straight. I couldn't believe it—the mainstream media was finally taking notice of my academic accomplishments. After all these years of being pummeled by Corey Smertz for being smart, I was being celebrated!

But, suddenly, Anastasia O'Neil got right up in my face. "What do you know about the hero guy? People say you're friends with him. What are you hiding, and why? The citizens of Vortville have a right to know!"

"Uh, uhb, ahhh, ummm . . ." I fumbled, my on-camera cool instantly gone. I stumbled back into the house and slammed the door behind me.

Mom asked if I was okay. I told her I was worried about my physics test. She said, "Just remember, every action has an equal and opposite reaction. Pretty much all of physics can be boiled down to that."

I thanked her and ran back down to the basement, collapsing into my desk chair (set extra high).

I just slouched there, humiliated. I'd been lured and reeled in by Anastasia O'Neal's flattery. She had pulled the old bait and switch, and I fell for it, hook, line and sinker. (Okay, I'm done with all my fishing references now.)

It was then that I realized I'd been on the air live, and Stella and Chip had been watching me on TV! "Hey Nort, you're famous!" said Chip as he pointed to the TV showing Anastasia O'Neil still in my front yard.

"Though I can't reveal my source," Anastasia said, "this reporter has come to possess some very good evidence that Nort McKrakken is, at the very least, in contact with Vortville's very own hero guy. That's right, Nort McKrakken, the son of Colonel Brock McKrakken, the very man that the hero guy has made a fool of, time and time again."

Can't reveal her source, she said? She didn't have to. I would've bet a million bucks her source's name rhymed with Lert bon Krugen!

But Team C.H.I.P. had no time to waste on all this silliness. If some news hound wanted to risk the very existence of our fair town just to boost her pathetic career, I couldn't stop her. We had more important things to do.

We had a city to save!