Cries Behind Smiles

Chapter 27 : Guilty

After few seconds,I composed myself.I was so damn worried about him that I even forget to offer my Isha prayers.I'm not punctual in Namaz.I don't know I've tried so much but still I forget but since Dado's death a switch is turned on and I haven't skip a single prayer.
It may be due to the irritation caused by my jerk of a husband that I need something to calm down

We humans are such mean creatures.In pain,we remember Allah like we should do anytime.Why broken hearts feel Allah so close to them.Why not in happiness.Such selfish we are.

So I offered Isha prayers and slept in room besides our bedroom.It has single bed.It is kind of guestroom.I woke up early in morning.My sleep cycle is so unstable,sometimes I sleep too much and sometimes too little.

Your brain is also unstable,my subconsious taunted.

Oh thank you,for reminding me more of my problems.

I make breakfast as usual.I was pouring the tea in cup when I feel someone settled down beside on chair. Freaking bipolar devil!!

I faced him but kept on ignoring him putting plates on table.

"Good morning" he spoke with soft voice.I looked towards him to see his eyes,filled with guilt and remorse.

But I'm not buying any of it.I kept on ignoring him.I was leaving the kitchen when he grab my elbow.Now I was very furious.What the hell he thinks he is.He can talk to me anytime like nothing happened.

I glared at him with such intensity that he immediately let go of my elbow.My friends used to say to me I look pretty dangerous when I'm glaring like that because my dark large eyes become more larger.

I left kitchen and eventually moved towards bedroom.Afterwards I heard footsteps telling he had left.

So he is not even making an effort.I thought irritately.
Oh he was trying to before you scared him off.my subconsious reprimanded.

So let it be.I'm happy like this.I continue to act like this.Days kept moving like nothing happened.I often get his guilty filled gestures but kept ignoring.I'm hell stubborn.So I'll live like that unlike that egotistic jerk made first move.

I was so furious at him that I think of him as cushions,I kept on hitting them to remove dust.

"You arrogant piece of shit.What the hell you think you are.Just because you're hot every girl would obey as you say so."

I kept on blabbering and hitting cushion imagining it was his freaking beautiful face.

What the !!!! Why do I called his face beautiful
Uggh.

I feel little lighthearted after releasing my frustations on stupid cushion.
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It was 5 pm when I was showering when bell rang.I thought who it would be at this moment.Our housekeeper would be here to open the door.

I just put on my black kameez shalwar and combing my hair when the room door opened.I just looked at him through mirror.

His hair were messy,tie hanging loosely ,dark circles beneath the eyes showing lack of sleep.I kind of feel pity on him but the thought goes away as it rapidly it came.

He looked at me stunned and in admiration.

Whatt??why??
Then I noticed he was looking at my long black hair.I'm always covered so I guess he hardly saw them.I was always praised of my hair and I love them.

He started to came closer to me and I feel my heartbeating strongly.I nearly shivered when he took a strand of my hair rolling it on his finger and then smelled it now too close.

Please don't kill me like this.I closed my eyes to control my emotions.All my angered melted away when he was this close to me.This harmones messing up my resolve.

He then moved his hand towards my waist hugging me from back and looked at me with such intensity that I thought I'm going to faint right now.

"I'm sorry" he spoke in my ear,his warm breath sending tingles all the way down.His familiar scent engulfing me.

I was going to move away but he held me.
"Please.That day my fellow comrade died on a mission.I was so heartbroken.I was in pain,So I gave you pain that you don't deserve.I'm defaulted like that"

I almost forgive him on this declaration.I know how it feel when you lose someone you love.

I move from his hold although I like the touch.I felt safe in his arms.I move towards him smiling
"Its ok I understand"

He smiled and I thought his eyes lit upon hearing that.
He looked so breathtaking while smiling.He should do that more often.

He started pushing his hands towards his pocket and open a box
"I brought this for you as a way of apology"
I opened it and saw a beautiful necklace.It consist of silver chain with a tear drop embellished with beautiful silver crystals.

I immediately grinned "Its so beautiful,thank you"

He beamed at me."We have a party tonight.My fellow mate Ali is giving a party at his marriage .We both have to go.If you want to..."
He spoke hesitantly.I almost laughed at his scared face.

"I would love too" I immediately replied finishing his torture.

"Ok be ready.I'm going to freshen up then take you"
He smiled and left the room.
That devil had a soft side afterall.I smiled to myself but I still don't like him.I reminded myself.