BURN ; phan

t h r e e

Jackie had made taco's that night and made sure Dan and Phil were both fed well. Just as promised, they sat on Daniel's roof. The boy had pulled all of the blankets out of his hallway closet and stacked them on top of each other as Phil carried a bag of snacks and a few pillows. They laid down a sheet, then another and a soft blanket before they sat down, the pillows stacked behind their backs as they sat up against the rest of the house.

Phil dug through the plastic bag from the gas station down the street and pulled out the two sodas, handing the first one to Daniel. They looked up at the stars, Dan listing off the constellations, Phil sat back, amazed.

"How do you know all of these?" The older boy asked in awe as he looked between the new boy beside him and the stars above.

Dan leaned back against the roof, twisting the cap of his soda on and off, the cap clicking softly against the plastic bottle. He was quiet for a minute before he spoke, not bothering to look up at Phil. "I, uh- my dad bought me a telescope and a book of constellations before he died..."

"Your dad is dead?" Phil asked, frowning down at the brunet.

"Yeah, it's just been me and my mom since I was thirteen."

"My dad's dead, too. Heart failure."

"Really? How long?"

"I was ten, I think. I can't really remember much..." Phil whispered, pressing his finger into the bruise on his thigh, he could feel his mind slipping back into that dark place. That place without his dad and that place where he couldn't feel his voice in his throat. "I blacked out for a few years..."

"Me too," Dan admitted, shifting closer to Phil so he could get more of the blanket. Phil could feel Dan's eyes on his hand as he continued to tap on the bruise that seemed to be his only form of escape.

The brunet placed his hand on Phil's, pulling it away from his leg. Phil stared at their hands for 3 seconds too long before he intertwined their fingers together. He thought for sure Dan would yank it away and yell at him, but he didn't, he only scooted closer and laid his head on the older boys shoulder.

Phil looked at their hands together and he could feel the weird ache in his ribs as his heart pounded against his chest. He swallowed his pride and deepest insecurities for the time being and let Daniel lay on him, his mind raced and thumped against his skull. The white noise behind his ears wouldn't shut up, his brain screamed at him to yell at Dan and jump off this roof.

"Are you okay?" Dan asked, taking his head off Phil's shoulder and look up at him.

The older boy squeezed his eyes shut, his head pounding so loud he thought for sure Daniel could hear it. Phil shook his head, slipping his hand out of Dan's and pressing his palms into his eyes to soothe the noise in his mind.

"I-"

"Phil?" Dan placed his hand on his shoulder, Phil quickly jerked away, eyes wide and blown out as he watched Dan's face contort from worry to hurt.

"C-can we just sit here? Not touching. I'm sorry, it's not you, I'm just-"

"-Phil. We can do whatever you want, you don't have to explain anything, I understand trust me." Dan nodded, the hurt somehow wiped from his face like a mask he took off.

Phil nodded quickly more to reassure himself than anything. "Thank you, Dan."

"Thank you, Phil. You're the one who's helping me." He smiled, earing a soft grin from the shaken older boy.

They sat in silence, Phil taking a few sips from his drink and trying to fix his breathing. Dan quietly mumbled the rest of the constellations, his voice sounded like Phil was drowning in honey and he quickly came to a conclusion that he liked the sound of the younger boys voice.