The Day My World Crashed (SEQUEL TO MY NIGHTINGALE)

Twenty One

TRIGGER WARNING

Alison

I SAT ON DEMI'S COUCH, SITTING SILENTLY BEFORE DEMI CLEARED HER THROAT.

"I want to show you something. If you're ready for it." Demi said, Wilmer had to call someone and before that he studied me and watched my every move. He was trying to find something, maybe to see if I was my old self.

He would be disappointed because even if I can't remember most of what happened, I know from simple facts that I have changed.

"What is it?" I asked Demi, and she smiled looking uneasy about the topic. I don't remember much of Demi, maybe bits and pieces. It's absolutely scary looking in the mirror and not recognizing who you are or looking at people who used to love you. No one could understand what it's like trying to remember who you are, looking at the tear stained faces of strangers who you fail to recognize as you own. It just frustrates me and it makes me want to not live with this torture. The torture of figuring out if you should trust someone or not, if they truly are who they claim to be, I wish I could explain it more in words but looking in the mirror makes my heart race in fear and I don’t know why.

"Your room." She answered breaking me from my thoughts.  I know something was up or maybe my room was an uncomfortable place for her. I’m not sure, every since I woke up in that hospital with various bruises and scars, I’ve never been sure of anything.

"Ok, you didn't change it like how you altered the house right?" I asked, trying to make it seem like I didn’t hate the house. I remember the old design in vague detail and that place looked more free and beautiful, it seems hard to breathe in this room. I had no idea what my room would like it seemed to have erased from my memory, I wanted to get up there fast, maybe it would trigger more memories and I’m willing to put up with the headache afterwards.

“No, I haven’t touched it since you left.” She quietly stated causing more unease to settle within me, what does she mean? I’m still not sure if I was kidnapped or something. I didn’t know how this room looked like, but the way Demi face filled with sadness and unease I knew it wasn’t as beautiful as the living room used to be.

“I’m not sure if I should...” I said, it seemed my mouth wasn’t my own as I played with my fingers. Even though I wanted to connect more dots, and see more memories I feel like I’m not ready to see my own room. Demi eyes flicked up to me, studying my expression for any signs that I was sure. She opened her mouth to answer but Wilmer happily came out of the kitchen with a smile on his face, his eyes rested on me for a brief moment with no emotion, when he turned to Demi his eyes lit up. Suddenly I felt out of place, was I not wanted or something?

The little motion Wilmer did was enough to make me feel like mouse surrounded by cats, it made me want to run and hide, it made me want to scream and cry. I don’t think he realizes how frustrating it is for me to sit here like everything here is okay and normal because it’s not. I feel defenseless and fragile, as he hugged Demi I got up and staggered to the kitchen which he came from, I saw a door near the edge and left through it seeing the moon shine through the dark clouds, I saw a fence door and exited through it, and It brought me to the front of the house.

Then I ran, I ran out the gates and left. I was so frustrated, I stopped running and walked in a familiar direction and somehow knew every turn I took until I was met with a park. I saw a girl laughing and giggling, she looked up and my eyes widened.

“Alison?” She said and that’s when I noticed she held someone’s hand and I felt sick to my stomach. The man looked at me shocked and turned pale. That’s when I knew life wasn’t what I wanted, that everyone thought I was dead, and stopped caring.

I wasn’t supposed to be here at all, I was supposed to never come back.

Because Samantha was holding Drew’s hand, the girl who bullied me all my life and my boyfriend, or ex-boyfriend, were holding fucking hands. It was the biggest wakeup call because I remembered Drew telling me he despised her, and I also remember Samantha kissing him and ruining our relationship.

“You’re alive?” Drew asked, his voice was deeper and he grew up nice. Samantha looked beautiful too and I looked like the train wreck I was, they lived their lives and I was snatched from doing the same. I nodded silently answering Drew’s question as tears welled up in my eyes.

“W-What happened to you?” Samantha asked and I grew aware of my short sleeve shirt, I shook my head and turned away, not being able to walk away yet I cleared my throat and turned back.

“A lot happened to me, things never are good for me.” I said with a shaky voice letting a tear fall as I walked away. I heard Samantha called out to me but I kept walking, that was until I felt someone grip my arm and turn me around. Drew threw his arms around and caressed my hair.

“I can’t believe our back. I-I thought you died Ally. I’m having a hard time believing you’re real.” He said and I kept my arms pressed to my side, he let go of me with a confused expression.

“I have amnesia Drew, I barely remember you or anything that happened between us. I-I know you’re are- or were my boyfriend but nothing more.” I confessed looking at the floor as Samantha pulled Drew off me and hugged me.

“Listen Alison, I don’t know if you remember me or not, but I made you a promise.” Samantha said and I furrowed my eyebrows trying to remember but I had no clue. “I promised you I would be a better person when you came back, and I am. You helped me Alison and now I have the opportunity to thank you.”

I smiled, even though I had no idea what she was talking about I was glad I helped her, I returned her hug and puled back, I turned around until I heard Samantha speak again.

“Alison where will you go?” She said and suddenly I remembered that night, I forgave her, she explained everything and promised me. I turned and smiled, before letting another tear fall.

“I won’t be coming back Samantha. Just promise to remember me ok?” I asked her and her eyes filled with hurt, as well as Drew. She looked broken over the fact that she wouldn’t see me again. She blinked and I saw her eyes filling with tears, but she smiled.

“Don’t worry Davis.” She promised, and I nodded, silently signaling to her that I remembered that conversation, and that I knew she was quoting that night. I walked away and Drew called my name but I knew Samantha had stopped him.

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